[It's true--there's a lot about the situation that Leon hasn't grasped yet. Their positions are close and warm and affectionate, so purely affectionate, but he still has no idea if this is... right. If this is what Stahn wants, entirely. If this is enough for him, or if there's more, or if...
But there's really no need to think it over that hard after all. Stahn pulls back just that little bit to meet his eyes, and Leon is helpless to do anything but look in his eyes, in a moment like this. In a time like this, there's no looking away.
And... it's rewarded.
He's happy. Stahn says he's happy, and he's smiling like that, and Leon can accept that. Somehow, that's so easy to accept, and he's not really sure why, except that it's Stahn and Stahn would never lie, and the atmosphere is so calm and warm and simple contentedness seeps in and--
--is he happy too?
Happiness is a bit too abstract a concept for him in general, but when he thinks back to those times when he was sincerely and truly happy... (Marian praising him, acknowledging him; Chal offering him his trust and his strength officially) then he can admit to himself that this is the same exact feeling.
...He really is happy too.
So he breathes out simply and quietly, slumping a little as he does, and while Stahn may still be looking at him, Leon's eyes slide shut. It's a lot to take in and a lot to acknowledge to accept that something like this could make him happy, honestly. He's still trying to cope with that. But... it's not bad, either.]
... I see. [His words are soft, and they don't give a lot into his thoughts, but the next ones probably do, a few moments later:] I understand.
[For someone like Leon, who is so bad at understanding emotion and feelings, especially ones like this...the fact that he understands is implication in and of itself that he feels that way too. It's... nice, he thinks. It's nice to feel happy, especially on a journey that he expected to be difficult from day one.
Maybe this is difficult in another way, but it's so warm that Leon can't bring himself to care. It's fine, if he gets burned like this--it's fine, because this sort of warmth is something he's never had before, and he can't give it up now that it's in his grasp.]
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But there's really no need to think it over that hard after all. Stahn pulls back just that little bit to meet his eyes, and Leon is helpless to do anything but look in his eyes, in a moment like this. In a time like this, there's no looking away.
And... it's rewarded.
He's happy. Stahn says he's happy, and he's smiling like that, and Leon can accept that. Somehow, that's so easy to accept, and he's not really sure why, except that it's Stahn and Stahn would never lie, and the atmosphere is so calm and warm and simple contentedness seeps in and--
--is he happy too?
Happiness is a bit too abstract a concept for him in general, but when he thinks back to those times when he was sincerely and truly happy... (Marian praising him, acknowledging him; Chal offering him his trust and his strength officially) then he can admit to himself that this is the same exact feeling.
...He really is happy too.
So he breathes out simply and quietly, slumping a little as he does, and while Stahn may still be looking at him, Leon's eyes slide shut. It's a lot to take in and a lot to acknowledge to accept that something like this could make him happy, honestly. He's still trying to cope with that. But... it's not bad, either.]
... I see. [His words are soft, and they don't give a lot into his thoughts, but the next ones probably do, a few moments later:] I understand.
[For someone like Leon, who is so bad at understanding emotion and feelings, especially ones like this...the fact that he understands is implication in and of itself that he feels that way too. It's... nice, he thinks. It's nice to feel happy, especially on a journey that he expected to be difficult from day one.
Maybe this is difficult in another way, but it's so warm that Leon can't bring himself to care. It's fine, if he gets burned like this--it's fine, because this sort of warmth is something he's never had before, and he can't give it up now that it's in his grasp.]