[it's nice, if nothing else, that they can have a situation like this and it doesn't end in an argument or leon walking away angrily. he can tell that there's no bite behind his words; it barely constitutes as a scolding when it's like this.
if anything, it's nice to hear leon tell him thinks like that. reassuring him that it's not really something he should apologize for—that's not so bad. there's a strange, quiet understanding that comes with it—leon's not angry with him, he just wasn't ready for that sudden outburst. stahn can't blame him for that, and he doesn't.... but it still feels like an immense relief of sorts to hear it directly from leon.
or... well, as direct as it gets in this sort of situation.
it's fine. this is fine.]
Right. I'll be more careful next time. [whenever "next time" may be. but there will definitely be a next time, because stahn is in no way giving up on the notion of more physical affection. even if it's only when they're alone and away from prying eyes, and even if it takes a long time to make progress. waiting... is okay.
but he wants to be able to feel leon's warmth more than he already does. for someone with a cool exterior, he knows that leon has a lot of warmth to give. it may not burn hot the way his own does; it's much more grounded, and maybe that's appropriate for their elemental affiliations. but when he has his fingers locked with leon's this way, he can feel a gentle sort of warmth that he knows leon possesses. it's enough for now but... stahn's selfish enough to want a lot more, and for other people to recognize it exists in leon, too.
for now though, this is okay. standing here with just this small spark of warmth against a freezing cold night in a snowy mountain capital... it's okay like this. he's perfectly content with it.]
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if anything, it's nice to hear leon tell him thinks like that. reassuring him that it's not really something he should apologize for—that's not so bad. there's a strange, quiet understanding that comes with it—leon's not angry with him, he just wasn't ready for that sudden outburst. stahn can't blame him for that, and he doesn't.... but it still feels like an immense relief of sorts to hear it directly from leon.
or... well, as direct as it gets in this sort of situation.
it's fine. this is fine.]
Right. I'll be more careful next time. [whenever "next time" may be. but there will definitely be a next time, because stahn is in no way giving up on the notion of more physical affection. even if it's only when they're alone and away from prying eyes, and even if it takes a long time to make progress. waiting... is okay.
but he wants to be able to feel leon's warmth more than he already does. for someone with a cool exterior, he knows that leon has a lot of warmth to give. it may not burn hot the way his own does; it's much more grounded, and maybe that's appropriate for their elemental affiliations. but when he has his fingers locked with leon's this way, he can feel a gentle sort of warmth that he knows leon possesses. it's enough for now but... stahn's selfish enough to want a lot more, and for other people to recognize it exists in leon, too.
for now though, this is okay. standing here with just this small spark of warmth against a freezing cold night in a snowy mountain capital... it's okay like this. he's perfectly content with it.]