realpolitik | Morgan | Oz

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Morgan | Oz | 076

[Goodbyes aren't easy at any point in time, really. Morgan knew this was coming, but even so... it's not like she was ready for it. Beating the Yao Corporation, figuring out the rebels, handling the mess before them...

She's proud of what they accomplished.

But even so, it means that now...they can go home. And she knows for a fact that she and Oz have different homes to go to.

She's musing on it, perched on a ruin of a wall and kicking her legs. They still have a little bit of time--should she talk to him now? Should she try to run with Empty-Headed Bliss as long as possible?

What should she do?

It's difficult, really, to know that when she's found something that she thinks could maybe be classified as love--or was, at the very least, definitely life-changing, she has to leave it behind. But... she'll always have the memories, won't she?

Honestly, she's so deep in her thoughts, chin perched on one hand and expression surprisingly grim compared to her usual cheer, that she wouldn't notice even if someone did come up to her.]

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[Oz should feel something, he thinks. He should feel triumphant, or at the very least happy that it's finally over, but all he can muster at the moment is, well, exhaustion. he's been putting one foot in front of the other for so long, he's been smiling no matter what for so long, that being confronted with the fact that he no longer has to do either of those things leaves him feeling... a little empty. Maybe it's because it's not a perfect storybook ending. ]

[For the moment, he separates himself from the crowd of similarly tired, but more enthusiastic Havenites, with a quick excuse, but a smile too of course. But the silence after leaving that atmosphere of relief and gaiety makes the lump in his throat and the dull, pressing pain in his chest more obvious.]

[Storybook endings just end, after all. they never talk about what comes after. So Oz is left to muddle in his own thoughts, because he knows the reason why he feels this way. There are promises to keep and people to see, but there's only one person at the moment that he really wants to see right now -- and she's the reason why, he knows, that he's feeling this way.]

[His wandering eventually leads him to the very wall Morgan's sitting on. Her back is to him, but he recognizes her immediately anyway, of course. His steps don't linger, he doesn't let himself, instead -- he keeps on walking, climbs up on that stone wall without falling down like a fool, and finally sits down next to her.]

[whatever her reaction, whatever she says, Oz turns to her with a smile of his own, genuine this time.]

Morgan. [it's a greeting and an exclamation of relief all in one, even as his eyes rest on her face.] How long have you been sitting here?

[she shouldn't be alone!! no morgans should be ALONE]

[It's sort of like a mini-miracle, she thinks, that he would show up like this. She didn't necessarily hear him coming (it's a wonder sometimes that she survived as long as she did in Haven), but she does hear him sit beside her, and of course, she could never, ever mistake his voice for anything else.

And honestly, despite her grim thoughts, and despite all of the things that she's afraid of and worried about, seeing him makes her smile. It's a purely simple response; it's Oz, and Oz makes her happy. It doesn't have to be any more complicated than that.

Honestly, the situation is complicated enough. It's good that sometimes things are simple.

So she smiles at him, and her words are cheerful and bright.]

Oz! I was just thinking about you--that's almost like a magic trick, showing up right when I'm thinking about you like that!

[She's easily pleased as ever, that's for sure. His question, though, gets some thought out of her.]

Hmm... it can't have been that long, but admittedly I think I was zoning out a little, so I'm not sure! Did you need something?

[in response, Oz's smile grows brighter at seeing Morgan's. The real magic is how content he feels whenever he sees her smile, how it chases away some of the worries deep in his heart. it's like he's in a bubble, without a care for the rest of the world slowly passing by.]

I wanted to see you. [he admits, miraculously not blushing like a moron... He reaches for her hand, then hesitates -- belatedly remembering.] Oh! And --

[instead, he pats himself down, gripping the lapel of his thin coat and rummaging on the inside for... SOMETHING.... WHAT IS IT OZ]

[HIS SMILE GROWS WIDER HERE, because he sure found the thing he's rummaging for -- ]

Look! [he PROUDLY PRESENTS a single red chrysanthemum.... where.... DID HE GET IT??? but more importantly, he holds it up for her!!!] Hehe, isn't it lovely? I thought of you as soon as I saw it!

[... Oh. Oh!!! Oh!

It feels like it's been so long since she's seen any plant life. Even since the apartments caved in with the roof, there have been no flowers to be found. But this one... it's gorgeous and bright and she accepts it with the happiest, brightest grin, eyes wide.]

Oz, it's beautiful! I don't know how you found this, but I don't even care--it's so great!

[She holds it to her chest (carefully), beaming.]

And it's not even knocking me out in the middle of a dangerous garden, so that's even better! [Look, they've had some Rough Times.

There's a pause as she looks down at the flower, and then, a bit more quietly--]

Hey Oz... will you stay with me for a bit?

[morgan PLS DON'T REMEMBER THE LOSER OZ MOMENTS....]

[he's stuck between beaming and blushing here, beaming because the flower made Morgan so happy and he feels like he accomplished something wonderful, and blushing because yes... HE REMEMBERS THAT MOMENT IN HIS LIFE.... he will never quite be super macho cool in front of morgan will he...]

[Her question gets him to pause though, not out of hesitance, but more surprise. His eyes soften.]

Of course I will! For as long as you need -- and longer too. [it's easy to say now that he's looking at Morgan gazing down at the bright red chrysanthemum, both as pretty as a picture. If he had a camera, if he had a single moment in his life that he'd like to capture, then this would be it. The next words come out a little quieter.] ...You can talk to me about anything too, you know. If that's what you'd like.

[SHE REMEMBERS THE LOSER OZ MOMENTS and she's still so fond of them... this is a good thing, really. They've seen each other at their worst and they still are so fond.

But of course. Of course he understands her that well. Morgan hesitates for a moment, and then she reaches out for his hand again, because she does better with the physical touch, especially if this is how this conversation is going to go.]

... I know. I know I really have to talk with you about this but... [She bites her lip, delicately resting the flower in her lap.] ...But I don't really want to make it sound more real. That makes sense, right? If I say it out loud, then...

[She can't pretend it won't happen anymore.]

[for a moment, it's as if Oz can't bring himself to actually follow through with his own words, even though he really meant them, truly. he can't imagine anything he couldn't talk to with morgan...]

[he looks down at her hand, then entwines his fingers with hers.]

I know. [then it becomes something he can't ignore any longer. ah, he thinks, now i understand. the pain his chest was heartache, the lump in his throat was sadness, and he was feeling this way even though they won because that meant...]

[the end, didn't it?]

I'm sorry, Morgan. For leaving you alone to think about it all on your own. [he squeezes her hand, softly. that's why he hadn't seen morgan celebrating with the others, wasn't it? ...after a moment, he speaks up again, a bit quickly. he doesn't want to change the subject, really, but a part of him does. he just wants to sit here and hold Morgan's hand. and look at her smile once more.]

...Did you know that flowers have all sorts of meanings? I wasn't sure if it was the same for you, but... back home, we have something called the language of flowers. I asked miss Yuuki to make the chrysanthemum for me, because I wanted to give that specific flower to you.

[She doesn't think he has any reason to apologize, really. She made the choice to separate herself from the others--for the simple reason that she just wanted some time to think on her own. She's the sort of person who has no troubles, so... what does she do when she does have them? She's honestly not sure. She had to figure it out.

But Oz is here, and he keeps going before she can do more than shake her head, and well... she's always been easy to get the attention of.

So when he brings up something she doesn't know, her attention is caught.]

Huh...? Flowers have meanings?

[If she knew that, she didn't know that she knew it... ah amnesia. Either way, she blinks at him, squeezing his hand a little automatically.]

What's a chrysanthemum mean, then?

[alright HERE IT IS... the moment Oz knew would come as soon as he picked the chrysanthemum out and mentioned the subject because of course Morgan would ask, her curiosity is one of the things he likes the most about her (which is a hard thing to judge bc he basically likes everything about her??? everything about morgan is his favorite)]

[He takes a deep breath, but his cheeks suddenly color anyway... help]

Well! It actually also depends on the color of the flower, you know? Er, that is, a chrysanthemum could mean one thing, but a white one could be something different! Like truth, for example...

[WHY IS OZ BABBLING??? OZ HURRY UP]

[but the one in Morgan's hand is RED... so...]

And, um. [um................ Oz turns around to properly face her, clasping her hand with both of his and staring down at it as if it's the most interesting thing in the world.]

There are a lot of flowers that remind me of you, so it was hard to pick in the end. [he did think about getting a bouquet... but a single flower was the sort of romantic gesture that pinged all of Oz's inner romanticism tbh]

But, I went with the red chrysanthemum because... Because... [WHAT HAPPENED TO OZ THE HOST?? why can't he be as smooth as he was in that poppy garden except no scratch that he never wants to be as disastrous as he was in the garden]

[.....he blushes deeply, not that he wasn't before, but it's more obvious now!! And even though the cowardly part of him would like to stare at Morgan's fingers forever, he forces himself to tilt his chin up, so he can look at Morgan properly!! properly!!! yes]

Because... l-l-love...

[FUCK]

[WAIT]

[he blushes harder... REWIND LET HIM DO THAT AGAIN]

I mean -- !! It means l-love, so I wanted to give it to you because -- [a quick, calming breath, and then a smile.]

...Because I love you.

[THERE!!! HE SAID IT!!! FINALLY!!! his grip curls around Morgan's hand and for a moment he's not sure where to look, but he keeps his gaze trained on Morgan's because these are his sincere feelings, even if it's taken him so long to admit them, and Morgan deserves only the truth from him, doesn't she?]

[now let his face erupt into flames and let him die....]

[She's not really sure what she's expecting, but it'll probably be cute and adorable, because it's Oz. Oz is always cute and adorable--even his distressed faces are just really wonderful. Morgan can never regret them at all. So she watches the blush on his face and smiles as he ducks his head.

So cute.

His hands are warm on hers, and she shifts a little to face Oz properly, interested and curious. It has to be important for Oz to initiate holding her hand like this, after all, even if he's gotten better about it slowly but surely.

Because?

Because...?]

[Because he loves her.

Naturally.

That's of course the--]

[ W H A T ]

[He... loves her.

Oz loves her.

Morgan has always known that Oz thinks that she's important. She's always known that he likes her a lot, that he admires her, that he trusts her. She'd figured that honestly, that was enough. She was warmed enough to know that there was that much of Oz's affection reserved for her, when he was always such a bright spot in everyone's lives.

Even as she realized that her own feelings were shifting, melding and turning into something that she could really only classify as love.

Morgan doesn't really know how long she's loved Oz. All she knows is that she loves his eyes, and the faces he makes, and the way that he's still holding her hand, and the way he's still meeting her eyes even with how embarrassed and unsure he clearly is.

And to think that that love could be reciprocated... it makes her want to cry. And so she does, because she's Morgan and she's always been pretty free with her emotions; her eyes well with tears, and she sniffles, reaching out to grab Oz's hand with her one free hand as well, so she's clutching onto him as well, with everything she's got.

The tears spill over, even as she meets his eyes with a stunned expression, though a smile is quick to spread across her face even so, bright and warm and happy--]

[And then any elegance of the moment is ruined as she starts to cry properly, because she's Morgan and really, she's never been able to retain any such elegance at all.]

W-waaaah...

[She's quick to rub a sleeve across her eyes, trying to get herself in some semblance of put together, but she doesn't really manage before she's beaming (tears and all) and--]

I love you too, Oz! I love you so much it feels like my heart could burst sometimes but thankfully it doesn't because that wouldn't be very healthy--but that's how much I love you!

[There's a moment, a really stupid moment, when Oz wildly thinks back on every moment that made him feel like he didn't deserve feelings, much less love, from anyone around him. like that time he tentatively put himself out there, but was rejected by Zai. He's never quite gotten over it, nor the idea that he's worthless -- but at this moment,]

[with Morgan smiling at him like that]

[It's more than he could ever deserve, but he's not frightened by it at all. He's happy, he's glad, he feels like crying along with Morgan right at this moment and his eyes are growing wet at the corners, but]

Morgan...

['I love you too, Oz!']

[he's crying, he's definitely crying. he doesn't even think about how uncool he must be at this moment, he doesn't care about any of that! he doesn't care that he couldn't have said this in a better way, in a lovely room, better-groomed and better-dressed, because Morgan loves him too, and that's enough to make everything in Haven look beautiful.]

Hehe! [UGH HE'S CRYING BUT HE'S ALSO LAUGHING... Morgan will always never fail to make him laugh, especially about that bit about her heart bursting which would normally make him alarmed, but he takes it as Morgan's usual brand of humor, the brand he treasures. He tightens his grip on her hands once she finishes rubbing her eyes, then presses a kiss against her fingers. Straightening up, and beaming (while also crying and laughing?? these two)]

I love you, so don't cry, Morgan! [EVEN THOUGH HE'S CRYING TOO...] Thank you...!

[for every feeling he can't put into words right now]

[They're both laughing and crying now, like the messes they are. Morgan doesn't know the entirety of Oz's backstory even now, but she thinks that's fair. After all, he doesn't know hers either, because neither does she. So they're on even ground here, and when he wants to tell her, she'll be there for him. But right now, what really matters is what she has right in front of her.

That she loves Oz.

And that Oz loves her.

So a moment later she's gently pulling her hands away and setting aside the flower with exaggerated care--and then she's flinging her arms around Oz's neck, because at moments like these, she just can't really be happy with that distance. She wants Oz to know that more than anything, she'll always be here to reach for him like this.]

I'm crying because I'm so happy...! [Sniff!

Wow these two are a disaster.]

Don't thank me, Oz, of course I love you, I've loved you for awhile now because you're just the best!

[It takes her a moment, but slowly she at least calms down enough to carry on mildly more calmly, though she's still sniffling a little (and it's definitely all happy emotion).]

Even if you didn't ever really need to save me, [oops] you really are like my prince, okay, Oz?

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Morgan | Oz | 076

IM HERE TO CRY

OH BOY ME TOO

we're 2 eager for tears 1/2

2/2

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exams are OVER im back to make cal sad... u///u

OH NO you f i e n d

1/2 LAUGHS EVILLY

2/3 no i gotta make this longer

3/3 FINALLY

1/many, bear with me here

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okay i'm done HOW DARE YOU

1/2 OH MY GOD....

2/2 im gonna cry... MORGAN!!!!

i'm gonna cry too because this is Too Much