[Being with Kiki was surprisingly (or perhaps not surprisingly at all) incredibly easy.
Not much changed, really. They remained as Zen's aides, they continued to put him first at all times... they mostly continued on with their lives, and if on occasion Mitsuhide's touch lingered on Kiki's shoulder or fingers, nobody really said anything.
And so life carried on.
Until they're sent on a mission by Zen--it's nothing super dangerous, though it's tedious and lengthy, and the advent of a rather large storm means it's only more necessary that they stop for the night at the first dingy inn they can find. There's only one available room, and thus one available option, especially when it's cold outside...
They have to share the bed.
But Mitsuhide, in newly dry clothing and staring at the bed, hair still damp, seems uncertain (putting it lightly). Sure, they've decided there's something there, but... they aren't at the point of sharing a bed. It could besmirch Kiki's honor!]
[ While Kiki does maybe care about thirteen percent for her honor - and only because her honor is linked quite closely to Zen's - sharing a bed with someone she additionally plans to spend the rest of her life with isn't one of those things that she'd consider any kind of questionable.
Which isn't to say that she doesn't know what thoughts are racing through Mitsuhide's head, even without having to look at his face. Kiki can read her partner like a thoroughly-scoured book, and all it takes as she steps out, hair also damp and curling slightly at the ends over her shoulders-- is just a glance, from the bed to him.
This isn't all that new. Mitsuhide's been uncomfortable sharing just a room before, and Kiki was willing to grant him that little bit of relief. But things have changed, just slightly enough to call for something new beyond the way Mitsuhide touched her (as though still surprised that he could). Something like this. So-- ]
[Really, he can't even say he's surprised by this. It's just like Kiki to get right to the heart of the matter, just as it's just like Kiki to not take no for an answer.
But still... this sort of thing--it's difficult. Mitsuhide isn't the same as Kiki. He's not the same class, he's not the same level of poised, and he knows that her honor is a very precious thing.
(Even if really, sharing a bed innocently with the person he intends to marry is not questionable at all.)
Still, he knows better than to flat out argue with her.]
Is that...really okay? It wouldn't be any trouble for me to lay some blankets on the floor.
[ Kiki's only answer at first is a lifted eyebrow - do you really think I'd say no one was sleeping on the floor if sharing a bed bothered me - and she'll stay silent for a couple of minutes, just to let that sink in. ]
You won't be any more prepared without practice. That's a basic principle, Mitsuhide.
[ It occurs to her, not for the first time - or second or fifth - that Mitsuhide still harbors more doubts and uncertainty about this whole relationship change than Kiki herself does. Which he can't really be blamed for. She's not sure how long he's had feelings for her, and if he'd even let himself dwell on it more than was strictly necessary (which, for him, was probably "not at all").
He'll get better with time. But for now, if she has to be a little more reassuring than her usual... well, she can manage. ]
I don't really plan on spending our time together in separate rooms. And it doesn't really help either of us if you're afraid of brushing shoulders with me in your sleep.
[...Ah. Well. It's not like she doesn't make a good point here, of course.
It's just... he feels like his heart is going to burst out of his chest when he thinks about being that close to Kiki. For any reason, but especially for a long period of time in bed...]
Is it really all right?
[He's weakening surprisingly fast--mostly because he can see the logic in what she's saying, and the fact that she wants this trumps everything else. If she didn't seem so sure, it'd be a different matter entirely, but she does.]
[ Someone has to be confident in their budding-but-actually-rather-solid-for-some-time relationship, and Mitsuhide isn't at that point yet. Until he gets to that point (and probably even past that point), Kiki can take the lead and trust that her partner will match her pace once he's confirmed what that pace actually is.
Any amount of unimpressed stares would work here, but instead, she allows a very faint smile to emerge. Appealing to his sense of logic is one thing, and it's a method that's clearly working, but she can add in a little more. ]
If it's you.
[ She probably won't say something like that for another year or so. ]
If Kiki kills him before they share a bed, that resolves all of those problems.
She smiles at him, and he can feel his heart thump against his chest; he flushes a little, but...he's happy. He's really happy. He's always happy to see Kiki smile like this, regardless of if he's the source of it or not. It's something remarkable and amazing, and it's too precious to ignore.
And the words, of course, melt him from the inside out. It's okay, but only if it's him...? Because...they love each other, right?
After something as heartfelt as that, especially coming from Kiki, he'd never be able to continue to resist; instead, he nods jerkily.]
...Okay then. In that case, I... accept. [Mitsuhide you're just sharing a bed for the night.]
[ It's oddly formal for Mitsuhide, in a way that reminds her of the time he'd been hypnotized, but in this case... it's likely out of nerves. Which just makes it more amusing than annoying, even as Kiki carefully composes her own expression.
He'll have to get used to this. ]
Will I need to approach Prince Zen's aide with such forthright proposals, henceforth?
You don't, [ she'll agree, calmly. Because he really doesn't need to be, and as much as she'll tease him for it - in her own, rather dry way - she's willing to remind him each and every time that yes.
It's all right. ]
I appreciate you asking, but in certain cases, I'm not going to mind if you make a non-idiotic assumption.
[Really, in the end...isn't he just making this worse on Kiki too? If he starts acting differently just because they're together, Kiki won't be as happy, and it's that thought that really spurs him on his course.
He moves towards the bed, a little stiltedly, but very determinedly.
Their partnership is important; he doesn't want to make things odd.]
I'll try to keep things the way they were. [Are. Should be.] Sound good?
[ Mitsuhide, please stop walking over to the bed like you're going to wage war with it. Kiki runs her fingers through her hair, very briefly to ensnare and pull out any unruly tangles, and then she's stepping towards him. ]
Some things have changed. Acknowledging that is fine.
[ But don't run from it either, is really her biggest suggestion here. ]
Isn't that only natural? [ Kiki stays standing for the moment, staring down at him. Really, acting like this, it's like he's never gotten to this point with anyone before.
... Which she's sure is actually true, given that it's Mitsuhide and he hadn't even realized when the maids had developed crushes on him. ]
[He perks right up like an eager puppy at that, because...well. He's Mitsuhide. He's always been eager to please for her, but...he also is really hopeful that his own desires and things he'd like to change align with hers.
[ Well. First she's just going to settle down on the bed beside him, looking perfectly at home as though he's probably the only one between them who's remotely nervous about it.
Also true, for the most part, but even Kiki isn't 110% composed all the time. ]
You start. Between the two of us, I've probably been more selfish.
[ Mitsuhide seems to give her more credit than Kiki's ever expected, and she raises an eyebrow but lets him take her hand. Right, they're working on his confidence here. ]
I didn't tell you about my arrangement with my father when I should have. I was the one who came up to you to tell you I wanted you, when I didn't feel like waiting anymore.
[ And now the bed. Is she trying to ease him into it or is she really just tired of waiting? It's hard to say. ]
He looks admittedly a little panicked still when she starts to list those things. He's bothered by it, because to him, Kiki never did anything wrong at all.
But, well...]
No, that's not true...! I'm grateful that you did all of that! You know that I am, Kiki!
[ Honestly, he ought to know better by now, but if it's Mitsuhide, Kiki's willing to be a little more patient. Maybe not as much as she'd be with Zen or Shirayuki, but they usually didn't require patience anyway. ]
[This is still really hard, even if she told him she wants him to tell her--but he perseveres solely for that reason. She wants him to tell her, and that means that he can't not, too.]
... To h-hold you. [He only stammers a little, face going red.] ...In my arms.
That would...be fine, wouldn't it? [Either way, as embarrassed as he is, he's also smiling at her... because he still likes being this close to Kiki.]
[ That was... almost impressive, Mitsuhide. And probably took a great deal of mental fortitude, knowing him, so she can't really stop herself from smiling. ]
So Kiki wants this too, then. That's what becomes very clear and obvious to him in that moment, and so gently, he'll reach out to her, still standing there, and tug her lightly towards the bed.
And once she's seated as well... he just wraps his arms around her and hugs her tightly, eyes sliding shut as he breathes in this moment of being able to truly and completely have her in his arms. Granted, this is just a hug and really he'd like to cuddle with her in bed, but--
[ It's definitely a process, but this is progress too, considering how long it even took them to get to the point where Mitsuhide was willing to hug her for longer than a couple of seconds.
And that Kiki was willing to let him.
The towel drops on the bed, and Kiki slips her arms around her partner in return, resting her forehead on his shoulder-- before her grip tightens a bit and she tilts to the side, hauling him with her. ]
[There is a bit of a startled, quiet yelp at that, though he'll deny it to his grave--but then they're on the bed, his arms still wrapped around her and her arms are around him too--
And slowly, he relaxes.
This is... this is perfect.
So he gently tugs her just a little bit closer, smile gentle and content and happy as he rests his cheek on her hair.]
[ Sorry it's probably still sort of damp, Mitsuhide. It'll dry eventually, and Kiki's a little too content to move if he's got protests. ]
That wasn't too difficult, was it?
[ Even though she had to help him along, but that's usually how things go. Mitsuhide tends to get confident only when he's angry, or if Kiki's encouraged him enough on any given front. ]
[He has absolutely zero complaints about this entire situation. As far as he's concerned? It's completely and totally perfect.
He sighs softly, nuzzling a little into her hair despite himself--he doesn't quite realize just how easy it is to be affectionate now that she's given him the go-ahead.
Though he'll admit, somewhat sheepishly:]
I can still feel my heart beating a little too fast... [It's scary!!] ...But I'm really happy.
... One of these days, you might actually find it boring enough to fall asleep to.
[ Probably not anytime soon, and if he focuses, he'll realize he might be able to pick up on her pulse racing faster than normal, but she still sounds perfectly casual. ]
Try not to stay awake too long. [ wallowing in his nerves... but she leans in, closing her eyes with a soft sigh. This... should be fine. It's new, for both of them, but she's spent many a night with Mitsuhide by her side. This won't be hard. ]
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aideing) wrote in ![[community profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/community.png)
realpolitik2016-08-20 09:20 pm
bed sharing;
Not much changed, really. They remained as Zen's aides, they continued to put him first at all times... they mostly continued on with their lives, and if on occasion Mitsuhide's touch lingered on Kiki's shoulder or fingers, nobody really said anything.
And so life carried on.
Until they're sent on a mission by Zen--it's nothing super dangerous, though it's tedious and lengthy, and the advent of a rather large storm means it's only more necessary that they stop for the night at the first dingy inn they can find. There's only one available room, and thus one available option, especially when it's cold outside...
They have to share the bed.
But Mitsuhide, in newly dry clothing and staring at the bed, hair still damp, seems uncertain (putting it lightly). Sure, they've decided there's something there, but... they aren't at the point of sharing a bed. It could besmirch Kiki's honor!]
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Which isn't to say that she doesn't know what thoughts are racing through Mitsuhide's head, even without having to look at his face. Kiki can read her partner like a thoroughly-scoured book, and all it takes as she steps out, hair also damp and curling slightly at the ends over her shoulders-- is just a glance, from the bed to him.
This isn't all that new. Mitsuhide's been uncomfortable sharing just a room before, and Kiki was willing to grant him that little bit of relief. But things have changed, just slightly enough to call for something new beyond the way Mitsuhide touched her (as though still surprised that he could). Something like this. So-- ]
Neither one of us is taking the floor.
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But still... this sort of thing--it's difficult. Mitsuhide isn't the same as Kiki. He's not the same class, he's not the same level of poised, and he knows that her honor is a very precious thing.
(Even if really, sharing a bed innocently with the person he intends to marry is not questionable at all.)
Still, he knows better than to flat out argue with her.]
Is that...really okay? It wouldn't be any trouble for me to lay some blankets on the floor.
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You won't be any more prepared without practice. That's a basic principle, Mitsuhide.
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[Okay, now he's squawking, if in a strangled way.]
Practice?! I--I mean, I understand where you're coming from here, Kiki, I do, but--
[...And then, with the slightest thread of hope:]
You...want us to practice this?
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He'll get better with time. But for now, if she has to be a little more reassuring than her usual... well, she can manage. ]
I don't really plan on spending our time together in separate rooms. And it doesn't really help either of us if you're afraid of brushing shoulders with me in your sleep.
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It's just... he feels like his heart is going to burst out of his chest when he thinks about being that close to Kiki. For any reason, but especially for a long period of time in bed...]
Is it really all right?
[He's weakening surprisingly fast--mostly because he can see the logic in what she's saying, and the fact that she wants this trumps everything else. If she didn't seem so sure, it'd be a different matter entirely, but she does.]
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Any amount of unimpressed stares would work here, but instead, she allows a very faint smile to emerge. Appealing to his sense of logic is one thing, and it's a method that's clearly working, but she can add in a little more. ]
If it's you.
[ She probably won't say something like that for another year or so. ]
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Well.
If Kiki kills him before they share a bed, that resolves all of those problems.
She smiles at him, and he can feel his heart thump against his chest; he flushes a little, but...he's happy. He's really happy. He's always happy to see Kiki smile like this, regardless of if he's the source of it or not. It's something remarkable and amazing, and it's too precious to ignore.
And the words, of course, melt him from the inside out. It's okay, but only if it's him...? Because...they love each other, right?
After something as heartfelt as that, especially coming from Kiki, he'd never be able to continue to resist; instead, he nods jerkily.]
...Okay then. In that case, I... accept. [Mitsuhide you're just sharing a bed for the night.]
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[ It's oddly formal for Mitsuhide, in a way that reminds her of the time he'd been hypnotized, but in this case... it's likely out of nerves. Which just makes it more amusing than annoying, even as Kiki carefully composes her own expression.
He'll have to get used to this. ]
Will I need to approach Prince Zen's aide with such forthright proposals, henceforth?
[ Hopefully not. ]
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N-no...!
[She's teasing him again... his shoulders slump a little, but he just rubs the back of his head sheepishly.]
...Sorry. I know I don't have to be like that with you.
[If he can't be comfortable with Kiki of all people, even in something like this...who can he be comfortable with?]
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It's all right. ]
I appreciate you asking, but in certain cases, I'm not going to mind if you make a non-idiotic assumption.
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[Really, in the end...isn't he just making this worse on Kiki too? If he starts acting differently just because they're together, Kiki won't be as happy, and it's that thought that really spurs him on his course.
He moves towards the bed, a little stiltedly, but very determinedly.
Their partnership is important; he doesn't want to make things odd.]
I'll try to keep things the way they were. [Are. Should be.] Sound good?
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[ Mitsuhide, please stop walking over to the bed like you're going to wage war with it. Kiki runs her fingers through her hair, very briefly to ensnare and pull out any unruly tangles, and then she's stepping towards him. ]
Some things have changed. Acknowledging that is fine.
[ But don't run from it either, is really her biggest suggestion here. ]
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[He considers it for a moment, rubbing the back of his head, even as he finally sits on the bed.]
...Then there will be even more things that I want to change. [A small, sheepish laugh.] Is that too selfish to admit?
[Because...it's true.]
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... Which she's sure is actually true, given that it's Mitsuhide and he hadn't even realized when the maids had developed crushes on him. ]
There are some things I'd prefer to change, too.
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[He perks right up like an eager puppy at that, because...well. He's Mitsuhide. He's always been eager to please for her, but...he also is really hopeful that his own desires and things he'd like to change align with hers.
SO NOW HE'S JUST LOOKING AT HER.
ENLIGHTEN HIM.]
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Also true, for the most part, but even Kiki isn't 110% composed all the time. ]
You start. Between the two of us, I've probably been more selfish.
[ AKA straightforward. ]
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[He's quick to protest that, perhaps unsurprisingly. He's shaking his head, eyes wide and...reaching for her hand, cautiously.
That's a gesture that he's at least starting to get used to.]
You've never been selfish!
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I didn't tell you about my arrangement with my father when I should have. I was the one who came up to you to tell you I wanted you, when I didn't feel like waiting anymore.
[ And now the bed. Is she trying to ease him into it or is she really just tired of waiting? It's hard to say. ]
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He looks admittedly a little panicked still when she starts to list those things. He's bothered by it, because to him, Kiki never did anything wrong at all.
But, well...]
No, that's not true...! I'm grateful that you did all of that! You know that I am, Kiki!
[He shakes his head.]
I don't see it as selfish at all!
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[ He gets her point, doesn't he? ]
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[He rubs the back of his head sheepishly, before he laughs softly, shaking his head. Kiki is too much for him, as always.]
I understand. In that case... I guess I should just tell you, right?
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[ Honestly, he ought to know better by now, but if it's Mitsuhide, Kiki's willing to be a little more patient. Maybe not as much as she'd be with Zen or Shirayuki, but they usually didn't require patience anyway. ]
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[This is still really hard, even if she told him she wants him to tell her--but he perseveres solely for that reason. She wants him to tell her, and that means that he can't not, too.]
... To h-hold you. [He only stammers a little, face going red.] ...In my arms.
That would...be fine, wouldn't it? [Either way, as embarrassed as he is, he's also smiling at her... because he still likes being this close to Kiki.]
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Do you see me telling you to stop?
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So Kiki wants this too, then. That's what becomes very clear and obvious to him in that moment, and so gently, he'll reach out to her, still standing there, and tug her lightly towards the bed.
And once she's seated as well... he just wraps his arms around her and hugs her tightly, eyes sliding shut as he breathes in this moment of being able to truly and completely have her in his arms. Granted, this is just a hug and really he'd like to cuddle with her in bed, but--
It's a process.]
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And that Kiki was willing to let him.
The towel drops on the bed, and Kiki slips her arms around her partner in return, resting her forehead on his shoulder-- before her grip tightens a bit and she tilts to the side, hauling him with her. ]
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And slowly, he relaxes.
This is... this is perfect.
So he gently tugs her just a little bit closer, smile gentle and content and happy as he rests his cheek on her hair.]
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That wasn't too difficult, was it?
[ Even though she had to help him along, but that's usually how things go. Mitsuhide tends to get confident only when he's angry, or if Kiki's encouraged him enough on any given front. ]
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He sighs softly, nuzzling a little into her hair despite himself--he doesn't quite realize just how easy it is to be affectionate now that she's given him the go-ahead.
Though he'll admit, somewhat sheepishly:]
I can still feel my heart beating a little too fast... [It's scary!!] ...But I'm really happy.
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[ Probably not anytime soon, and if he focuses, he'll realize he might be able to pick up on her pulse racing faster than normal, but she still sounds perfectly casual. ]
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Boring? Never.
[Not ever.]
But if it means I get to sleep with you like this... I'll find a way to relax a little. I don't want you to be uncomfortable either!
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[ Thankfully, that's only happened once. She'll likely find it easier to sleep like this than Mitsuhide will, but at least he's willing to try. ]
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[At least things are somewhat back to normal.
Mitsuhide is back to squawking awkwardly.]
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[ Because that would be wonderful. ]
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Under my own power, that will never happen again.
[Obviously he can't speak for anything else or weird shenanigans, but...to his best abilities, it won't.]
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[ And for his troubles, she'll lean in to press her lips to his forehead-- briefly, but hey. Kiki's learning, too. ]
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Any other requests, while we are discussing them here like this?
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[ Kiki asks for very little. ]
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Okay, okay... I get it.
[A deep breath in, and then out...and then he settles a little, smiling.]
...Goodnight, Kiki.
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Eventually.
First, he has to admire her for a moment, and the way she can rest in his arms just like this, and how perfect that really is. He's lucky, isn't it?
He's still contemplating how lucky he is when his eyes slide shut and he slips into sleep.]