realpolitik | Leon Magnus | Stahn Aileron

Right. Anytime we want... we can.

[he's sheepish to admit it too, though. it's still definitely a bit difficult to speak about it so directly. even though they've now been some form of intimate, even though they've touched in the most personal of ways... it's hard to speak it aloud.

this is probably one of the first times it's easier to see that stahn's ears are as flushed as his cheeks—he can always feel it, but his hair does well to mask it, generally.]

I... I don't want to hold back too much with you. [which is to say that he wants more of leon. that he's wanted more of leon for a while...

it's a strange thing for stahn to admit, when he's always the one pegged as oblivious to these things. to others, it probably even seemed strange that he thinks of them at all—but stahn is normal and healthy, he has wants and needs too.

it just so happens that all of his needs are leon, and he's been really patient in waiting for them to both be completely ready.]

[It's cute..... It's cute how Stahn goes red, it's cute how he stammers and speaks like this about all of this--it's all cute. And much like usual, when Stahn's unsure and still trying to get his bearings, Leon's a bit more confident.

Still, Leon doesn't want to be too provocative in this case. They've both decided that they're going to clean up and call it good for the evening, but Leon also doesn't think that this opportunity where they're in the bath together should be squandered either.

So it's his turn to lean forward, pressing his lips to Stahn's carefully, making an earnest attempt to keep everything completely chaste, and then he settles back, reaching for the shampoo. He can help. He can keep them on track. And tomorrow...they can try something new, maybe, or do what they did before--that would be fine too.]

Then don't. [It's a simple answer, even as he reaches out to slowly start to lather the shampoo into Stahn's hair. This...allows him to still be close and intimate with Stahn while still keeping it tame, and it has the bonus of letting him bury his fingers in Stahn's hair at the same time.

Where's the problem there?]

If there is a problem, I will stop you. [If there's something he doesn't want, or doesn't like, he'll make it very plainly clear. Leon keeps his eyes and his focus on Stahn's hair, and his words are entirely calm.]

So if you do not want to hold back with me...then don't.

[stahn shudders a quiet breath not following the kiss, but when leon begins to lather the shampoo. it's... different. maybe it's not the first time that stahn has had someone else wash his hair, but...

it's leon.

leon is doing it, and that sends tingles through his whole body—in a good way, of course. he knows it means that now is not the time for what they almost started again, but all the same? it seems to settle his heart a bit. for a few moments, his eyes fall completely closed, and he's just soaking in everything about what he currently feels. leon's hands are buried in his hair as ever, but there is deliberate movement and purpose this time and it honestly feels both good and relaxing.

he wants to do the same for leon, but he knows he has to wait. in the meanwhie, he can at least respond to what leon is saying.]

I know. That's what you said before and... here we are now. [they've taken a pretty massive step, and it's probably just the first of many more, he knows. but he still feels sheepish in admitting all of this out loud.]

I think I have to hold back sometimes...

....Or you may not ever have time to get anything else done. [embarrassing? yes. mischievous? absolutely. honest? without a doubt.

there's very little denying just how much stahn wants every part of leon all the time.]

[Well, Stahn's not wrong. He stopped holding back and they ended up flat on the bed practically immediately. The reminder of that does make Leon blush a little despite himself; he clears his throat, vaguely embarrassed, though his hands are as certain and calm as ever while lathering up Stahn's hair. He has a lot of it, after all; taking care of that is a full time job.]

Naturally, I will have to get my work done first.

[Obviously. Even for this, Leon won't neglect his work, and he knows Stahn won't intend for him too. But that aside.... the look he gives Stahn is almost mischievous in turn. Maybe on this sort of thing, they're completely on the same page.]

But I think otherwise we do have the time to spend with something like this, so... [His lips quirk into a smirk, even as he then leans forward to lightly press them to Stahn's and murmur there--]

Try me.

[Don't hold back at all--and see how Leon reacts.

And then he pulls back, finally removing his hands from Stahn's hair to wash them in the water now that he's all lathered up, nodding calmly.]

Now you only need to rinse.

[it's almost surprising what a tease leon can be sometimes. his words are so baiting and so enticing, with his tone and the smirk and the way he presses his lips so lightly against stahn's...

it's really kind of unfair.]

...I won't give you any free time once you're done. [stahn can't help himself but to say that, to coyly tease in return and let leon know that he wants to follow through on this.

he wants more of leon.

he doesn't want to hold back, because he want to explore all of leon's body and every possibility that comes with it. not everything will go smoothly, and he already knows there's so much he'll fumble through along the way... but he wants it. he wants him for himself, but he always wants to make leon feel really good too.

that's why he uses his legs to pull leon a little closer to him before reaching for the shampoo and preparing to lather up leon's hair. it's his turn now—he can rinse his own hair out in a minute.

not before leaning in to kiss leon lightly on the lips—but he still lingers before he runs soapy hands through leon's hair, lightly massaging his scalp with the tops of his fingers to work up a proper lather.]

[...What a tease. They're playing with fire here, and they don't even seem to realize it. Stahn pulls him closer and Leon follows, completely compliant, body moving along with Stahn's urging without a single moment's protest--but then instead Stahn focuses on cleaning his hair, and Leon sighs softly, tilting his head into the touch.

The physical intimacy had been new and exciting and engaging, but this is...well, pampering, and that's equally new and strange. For all that he had maids growing up, they didn't take care of him like this, but...

He likes it.

He likes being pampered by Stahn, and much like a happy cat, he tilts his head to lean more into Stahn's touch, eyes fluttering shut as he sighs his pleasure in a completely different way from the noises he was making before. But between the promise of more enjoyment in the future and this...

Leon's a very content soul, and he keeps his mouth shut, because otherwise he's pretty sure all he'd be capable of are embarrassing content noises.]

[stahn is gentle in his motions, massaging leon's scalp with care, running his fingers through the strands—the fact that he usually has so much of his own hair to wash comes in handy at a time like this, because he's pretty good at giving a good lather to the shampoo.

the room is quiet otherwise, the sound of that, the swish of the water and leon's pleased sighs being the only thing that echoes in the room aside of their breathing and... it's really nice. being focused on what he's doing means that stahn is looking directly at leon, and he's almost certain this is the most comfortable and relaxed he's ever seen him. this is good.

maybe that's why stahn can't help himself. when his fingers reach the shorter hairs at the nape of leon's neck, he lingers before leaning forward, planting a small, not-quite chaste kiss at the corner of leon's mouth.

he can't help it.

he just really wanted to kiss leon again and express how happy he is.]

I think I could get used to doing this more, too. [if leon will allow it, of course.]

[It's so much.

Stahn's so gentle, and his movements are so confident and certain; Leon doesn't bother to open his eyes, allowing Stahn to do whatever he feels like doing, because it all feels good. And he trusts Stahn, of course. That sort of thing could never possibly be in question any longer.

But with his eyes closed as they are, he isn't prepared for the kiss, and it's not entirely chaste. A shiver runs down his spine, and his eyes flutter half-open in surprise--but it doesn't stop him from leaning into the kiss anyway. With how relaxed he is and how unguarded he is in this moment, it draws a soft, quietly pleased groan from him too--he's not watching himself and trying to keep himself from making noise like he was even at the height of their passions.

No, this is different.

And he can't even quite bring himself to be embarrassed at the noise he made, because Stahn's fingers are still against his scalp and he really just wants more of that; he feels boneless and tensionless, and he honestly can't remember the last time that he felt that way.

So when he finally does speak, there's a breathy quality to his voice, and he can't quite hide the note of pleasure in it either.]

Mm... perhaps. If we are not in a rush in the evenings...there is no reason not to.

[Bathe together, that is.... especially not if Stahn's willing to do things like this. Please never stop.]

Mm... that sounds nice. We can really unwind like this.

[he says it with a quiet thoughtfulness, hands still moving gently through leon's scalp.]

Sitting like this, drying off and then getting into bed... [he muses, though stahn's face almost immediately gets more red and he forces his eyes closed because he realizes that he's being really direct about just... being intimate.

though it's fairly short-lived, because after a moment, he drops his hands into the water to rinse off the soap before cupping both of leon's cheeks with his hands. he leans in, kissing leon gently again. his lips linger for a moment, and then he'll just speak two more simple words against his mouth.]

...Thank you.

[It's cute, really.

Stahn's warmth, the fact that of all things, this is what gets Stahn to blush... it's all cute and somewhat sweet, and Leon's lips quirk into a smile despite himself. Thankfully, then Stahn's cupping his face in his hands and kissing him, which helps him hide that smile; Leon leans into the kiss gently as well, humming lightly.

This isn't anything Stahn has to thank him for--if anything, Leon thinks he should probably be thanking him. For not holding back, for embracing this, for everything he does.....

But for now, he just responds by pressing their lips together again, another gentle, insistent kiss, and his lips curve into a smile even against Stahn's lips. When he finally pulls away, he still looks pretty content.]

There's no need for that. [No need for thanks at all--because honestly?] This is the relationship we've chosen to have, and this is simply part of that.

[Sex, but also sharing baths and being able to be this intimate together--that's what they've added to their relationship, and it feels right.]

Naturally we will continue to do so in the future as well.

That's why I'm thanking you, though.

[stahn says quietly, and his tone is pure and sincere, despite the volume.]

For choosing me... Emilio. [he'll say after a moment. it's definitely very sentimental, but stahn can't really help what he feels.

he's very vulnerable in this position; he's completely exposed both physically and emotionally—and even though stahn is one to wear his heart on his sleeve, it really doesn't change the fact that his feelings about this run much deeper. even if stahn's not one to call himself a bumpkin aloud, he knows that his small town values and upbringing differ greatly from leon's.

and yet... leon is still with him. leon loves him, leon trusts him. leon feels these things enough to take intimate baths, to be completely exposed, to take their relationship in the direction of sex—it's a huge step.

it feels right to him too, and he knows without a doubt that he always wants to be by leon's side. so for leon to feel this way, for leon to want to keep moving forward together, figuring out the next steps and being so... happy...

stahn is grateful.]

...And for being able to smile like this. [because he's seen leon smile so much lately, and it means the world to him, it warms stahn's heart and it makes him swell because he knows that he's able to make leon's life better, he knows he's giving him reasons to smile and laugh and maybe view the world differently.

what more could he want? everything... everything he wants is right here in front of him, with a precious face cupped beneath his palms.]

[It's incredibly sentimental--and it's also surprising. From the time they began their relationship, it was always Stahn gently and patiently being there for Leon. It was always Stahn taking care of Leon. It was always Stahn who waited for him, who looked out for him, who was there for him when he was finally ready to take each of the small steps he took--

It isn't Stahn who's lucky to have been chosen by Leon, not in Leon's view.

It's Leon who's lucky here.

He tries to say so, his lips even part to allow him to speak those words, and then...Stahn's continuing, thanking him for smiling, and that's when Leon's eyes widen, lips parting in surprise more than anything. It's true--he'd been smiling. He'd felt it himself. He'd known... and he supposes that that's unusual for him in and of itself. He's never been one to smile much. But lately... he's just had more reasons to.

And one of the major reasons that he can smile more easily now is right in front of him, smiling so gently at him, even as they both drip water and both are completely exposed--

And gently, Leon laughs under his breath, the softest of simple noises, shaking his head.]

You're ridiculous.

[But he doesn't mean that in a mean way, or a harsh way at all. Instead, he looks up and meets Stahn's eyes certainly.]

That I am able to be like this... naturally, that is due to you. [It's almost painfully honest, especially coming from Leon, but he thinks it has to be said. Everything Stahn did for him on their journey, everything Stahn did when Hugo took Marian, and everything since... it's all thanks to Stahn.]

And for that... I'm grateful as well.

[that admission—even if somewhere in him, he knows it's true—is enough to make stahn's heart pound in a way that's practically audible. hearing leon say though words...

that he can smile and laugh, that he feels grateful for stahn's presence. they're things that make his breath hitch a little, because he didn't expect such an honest admission. it just shows how much leon has been growing and changing, and stahn honestly believes that it makes leon an outwardly better person for it.

he's always known that leon is capable of this. he's always believed in that, and believed with the right encouragement, he would be able to express what he felt in his heart a bit more earnestly. he's tried so hard to be supportive, and now those efforts really feel like they mean something.

because leon can smile more freely.

because he does, and seeing leon smile is simultaneously embarrassing (because he's cute and attractive and has a beautiful smile) and heart-warming (because he wants nothing more than for leon to be able to do that.)

so stahn can meet his gaze, though he leans forward—not kissing leon, but touching the tips of their noses together very gently.]

I... want to protect that. I want to make sure you always have reasons to smile. I'm happy knowing I could do it at all but now...

I want to make sure you always can. [leon has experienced so much pain; pain that makes stahn's heart hurt for him.

he wants to mend what he can. he wants to make sure nothing comes that will disturb that happiness or take it away from him. this is something stahn knows with certainty.

maybe they're not talking about marriage; maybe it's not something they'll ever seriously consider. but stahn is still vowing to stay by leon's side and do whatever it takes to make him happy and protect those feelings.]

...That would make me really happy. [it's embarrassing to admit out loud, and it might even be too much for leon to hear right now. but like the dam that broke before with their sexual tension, all the overwhelming feelings of love and the sentiments he's quietly kept to himself because he promised to never push too far and respect leon's boundaries and now flooding out somewhat uncontrollably.

this is what it's like to be in love, isn't it? stahn never understood it before, but the more he experiences moments like this, the more he gets it.]

[Stahn is truly the greatest of saps. Leon blinks when their noses touch, but he doesn't pull away or complain. He wasn't expecting it, no, but it's a cute gesture of love and fondness, so why would he ever complain? Instead, he remains there, nose pressed to Stahn's and expression content, even as he meets his gaze.

Because these things Stahn's saying... they're a lot, of course, but they're also not exactly a surprise to Leon. It's always been apparent that Stahn would like nothing more than to protect Leon and his smile, to make sure that he's warm and safe and happy, and to be there for him always.

Because Stahn's always done everything he can to do just that for Leon. Isn't that why he's loved him so much from the start?]

You've done enough. I am certain...that I could never ask for more.

[As long as he has Stahn, he thinks, he'll be able to smile like this.

Marriage doesn't even cross Leon's mind in this context; no, here all he can think is of their closeness, and how warm this is, and how pleased he is to be this close to Stahn, even naked like this, and it's so much sappiness that he's almost not sure how to handle it.

And then.

A blob of suds from the shampoo slides down his face, and Leon wrinkles his nose at the sensation, blinking and coming back to himself as he realizes that they've both been sitting here in the cooling bath water without really having accomplished any true washing.]

... We truly should get cleaned up, however. [They're just a sudsy mess right now.]

Ah...

[leon's right, even if... well, he really likes being in this position and he wants to stay with him a bit longer like that. but it's just not viable—staying in cooling bathwater.

he can't help but to let out a small laugh at the suds that fall, and stahn will carefully try to wipe them away from leon's face without getting any in his eyes.]

I guess it's okay. It won't be the last time. [since leon has already agreed that they can do this more—they've really taken a step forward tonight, and the way stahn seems to glow happily.

but he'll pull back slightly, his legs loosening a little. they do really need to get clean and stahn needs to rinse his hair out... which will undoubtedly take a little bit. this boy and his hair, they need so much help forever.]

[It truly won't... so they can get cleaned up and dry, and then crawl into bed together. It's not like this is the end of their intimacy for the night, after all; that's what Leon keeps telling himself, even as he shifts to pull away just enough to rinse out his own hair (an infinitely easier task than poor Stahn's). He'll go ahead and take the time to wash off the rest of him as well, especially his face; it's very necessary.

But he feels better like this as well. Already relaxed from how Stahn tended to him and his hair, and now the warmth of the bathwater and the feeling of being totally clean... it's nice.

It's also nice that he's finished significantly earlier than Stahn, so there's nothing really stopping him from just watching Stahn clean himself up the rest of the way.]

[stahn doesn't have much time to focus on watching leon clean up (though he wants to—he looks good when he's wet and dripping, after all), since he's so focused on his own hair.

so he takes the time to rinse out all the shampoo, being cautious to get the soap out from all over—at least he seems to do this pretty expertly and swiftly. he's a lot quicker than maybe one would expect. even if it still takes a bit of time just from the sheer amount of hair, the systematic way in which he handles it just proves all too well that he's used to it.

(and that he takes very good care of his hair, even if it often seems unruly.)

it's not until he's almost done that he catches leon watching him, and he cheeks almost instinctively flush from realizing... that leon is just doing that because he can and he wants to.]

Ahaha... I'll be done in a minute. I know it takes a lot longer than yours... [is he sheepish? yes, he's definitely feeling sheepish about it, and it shows.]

[...Cute.

It's cute.

Stahn's cute, and Leon's lips twitch as he fights back the urge to smile even just from that (and seriously, when did he get so sappy?). In some ways, Leon's pretty sure Stahn will never change, and...honestly, that doesn't bother him at all. Leon's had enough time to adjust to being naked in Stahn's company by now; he just leans back, sprawling out a little in the space on his side of the bath. It's fine.]

I can wait.

[If he gets to see Stahn wet and dripping and focused like this, especially after their previous activities... he can absolutely wait.

He's perfectly fine with this situation.]

[somehow... that's almost a little more embarrassing to stahn. it's hard for him to meet leon's gaze like this, because leon is watching him this way.

it's nice, but it's also embarrassing. it's not even that he's completely uncomfortable with leon seeing him; in this position, he can see all of leon too and he appreciates the fact that leon seems comfortable enough with it now. but he's just not used to leon watching him at all—he's usually occupied with so much else that there's no time to stare.

stahn's not used to being watched, that's all it boils down to.]

It'll get too cold if we stay too long... I don't want you to catch a chill. [okay, and maybe he also just doesn't want to be this far away from leon; even if they're still in the same tub, he can't wrap his arms around leon in this position and frankly?

that's what he wants to do right now.]

[That's the excuse Stahn's going with... he doesn't want Leon to catch a chill? Really? Leon has to fight even harder to keep the smile off his face at that, because it's just...it's honestly ridiculous. Sure, the bath water is starting to cool, but not so much that Leon's in danger of catching cold. How delicate does Stahn think he is?

Still... he'll go ahead and call that bluff, standing.]

Very well then. I suppose that's a sign that it is time to get out now.

[WHICH HE'LL DO.... just putting even more distance between him and Stahn at this point as he reaches for a towel.]

Ah—

[leon gets up so quickly and soon he's just out of reach... and it feels kind of strange. even if the intimacy isn't really gone from the room, leon feels a lot further away when it's like this.

and he doesn't want that.

so stahn is practically leaping to stand—in turn splashing the water and getting water everywhere just from the movement of his hair as he does so... which is somehow even more embarrassing. a smooth operator, stahn definitely is not, and even though he tries to be the more stable force between them because he's generally better at expressing himself... well...

he's definitely still an awkward teenager in love, and he's definitely still not-so-good at some things in this situation.

which is why he's standing in shin-deep bathwater, fully naked and exposed, dripping wet and...? yeah, that was a rash action with no real conclusion.

good job, stahn.]

[... Stahn is a bit of an embarrassment, but it's endearing--and Leon will take pity on him. He reaches for a second towel, and holds it out towards Stahn, but not too far from himself either.

Come join him then, they'll dry off and be warmer and cleaner and altogether far more satisfied.

And...well, the mood is already pretty good, so Leon has no complaints to be made, even as he wraps his own towel around himself after he towels his hair dryer.]

Ah... th...

Thanks. [he fumbles on his words as he's realizing how stupid he looks standing there like that. he'll take the towel as he steps out of the bath, first leaning over to drain the water from the tub (leon gets a nice extra show of ass this time) before he stands and starts to attempt to towel off his hair.

there's no point in doing this the other way around, though he probably still looks just as dumb rapidly trying to dry so much hair with his towel while the rest of him is exposed.

but hey, at least he's not shying away from that much, right?]

[Poor Stahn...so embarrassed now, and Leon only gets more and more comfortable. It helps, of course, that his hair is much easier to dry, and that he's able to wrap the towel around himself pretty promptly; he watches Stahn struggle for a bit before he pulls at the towel gently.]

Wrap that one around yourself. I will get you another for your hair.

[SO MUCH HAIR... how does Stahn handle it.

Either way, Leon's gotten an eyeful of Stahn, and as much as he appreciates all of it, he's more interested in making sure Stahn feels comfortable right now.]

[yeah, for once... it's stahn who is embarrassed beyond belief, so he just nods as he wraps the towel around his waist and lets out a quiet sigh.

he's not used to being the one who fumbles so much or so easily gets embarrassed; apparently... even stahn has things he's a little self-conscious about, and in this case, it's being so exposed in front of the person he loves most. while in the heat of the moment, and even with the bathwater partially covering them, it didn't seem to matter all that much...

but stahn is still a kind of sheltered kid that isn't used to this brand of intimacy either. even if he's okay with leon seeing all of him, doing so after a bath, standing there feeling a bit unsure and exposed embarrassed him a lot.

especially in conjunction with just not wanting to be even a foot too far away from leon on a night like this.

at least he looks a little more relaxed this way, even if still embarrassed it ended up this way at all.]

Sorry... I guess it's a little too much for me too right now. [it's been an emotionally overwhelming night, even if it's in the best way possible.

he's... in love.

he's disgustingly in love and it's hard to contain all of that while also wanting to put his best face forward to make that person he loves proud and comfortable too.]

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