you can't spell "alone" without "leon" (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
discard) wrote in ![[community profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/community.png)
realpolitik2015-10-16 11:13 am
discard) wrote in realpolitik2015-10-16 11:13 am
Leon Magnus | Stahn Aileron | 071
[this is a catch-all for boyfriends
here's a list
- ice cream ✓
- seasickness
- stahn sacrifice ✓
- reunion: judas ✓
- taming stahn's hair ✓
- piggyback rides ✓
- just imagine
- family dinner
- why is there pow hammer
- possessive leon
- apologies
- post-barbatos afterlife meeting
- AND MORE]
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It's not the first time Leon's thought that Stahn is cute, but he supposes there's no better time than when they're both half-naked and he's straddling Stahn's lap, hips pressed to Stahn's without any intention of pulling away, because...well, why would he?
Unfortunately, Leon doesn't carry hair ties around, and the last thing he wants to do is move away from Stahn for something so pointless, so in the end he has to let go of Stahn's hair and watch it fall back into its typical mane, even if a little tidier now, though he still likes how Stahn looks like this as well (because, well... obviously... and with Stahn's fingers sliding lower and lower, he doesn't really have the room to worry about inconsequential things like what style Stahn's hair is in.
He clears his throat weakly as Stahn's fingers slide beneath his pants and tug, breathing out a slow, shuddering breath, eyes half-lidded. He doesn't know what they're doing either, or how they're going to proceed or even what the right way to do this is, but this has been good, and enjoyable, and so why stop? They must be doing something right.
So while Stahn gets adventurous at the back, Leon will shift instead to run his fingers from Stahn's hair to his shoulders and then his collarbone and down to his chest--because even if Stahn's the sort to occasionally walk around shirtless, Leon's never really been able to touch (though Stahn probably wouldn't have argued that), and honestly? He's not going to miss his chance now, not when he can finally explore and touch and experience for himself. He'll move on as well, when he has an idea of how he wants to do that, but he's gotten distracted by this.]
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not when he feels leon's fingers exploring his chest. not when every touch still manages to give him goosebumps. and certainly not when his hands are in a precarious position. they're about to take a huge step right now, and there is a certain amount of weight to the fact that they're committing to this. what they're going to do... it's everything. to someone like stahn, who is the furthest from anything resembling promiscuous, a person who has an understanding of things but still such firm beliefs in his own morals and dreams... this isn't a step to be taken lightly.
they've fumbled time and time again, and while those times were disappointing—be it from fumbling or from certain admittances—he knows know that neither he nor leon had been ready to take this step. they wanted it, but there's so much more than comes with it in stahn's mind.
it's the purest form and expression of love to him; words don't mean as much as actions after all... something he'd always been taught, but that he never completely understood until he was with leon. leon, who was terrible at putting his feelings into words, but could channel them all into his actions, be them gentle, curious touches or hard, aggressive kisses. and maybe all of that is exactly why even though stahn doesn't hesitate, he takes a moment before he continues.
he needs to suck in a quiet breath and handle this right. passionate, but gentle enough, with no hesitation. he's trying his best to exude a bit of confidence, but his nerves definitely leave his mouth a little dry. even still though... he keeps going, tugging at leon's pants, gently pulling them down a bit of the way; it definitely leaves leon a bit exposed, but he only stops when he gets as far as he can go while he's still being straddled.
and with that, he gives leon a curious look, to make sure he's still okay... but it's also one that is undoubtedly nervous and sheepish, because he knows that if he shifts his gaze, he'll be able to see all of leon.
and that's a pretty huge step for them both.]
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Leon's not like Stahn, after all.
He's an intensely private person, he's the sort of person who doesn't show himself off, he's the sort of person who wears layers and long-sleeves and doesn't show skin. He doesn't want people knowing more about him. He's afraid of being exposed to other people, of letting other people in and letting them see him, but outside and in.
And he knows Stahn knows all of that.
Because Stahn pauses, looking at him with an expression like that, trying so hard to make sure that Leon's okay, and it's in that moment that Leon knows that even though he has no idea what they're doing here, not really, despite what they want--even if he's not sure what to do in this instant at all--he knows as well that this is what he wants.
He's fine with this.
And he wants Stahn to know that he is, even if his heart is in his throat enough that he can't really speak. His voice and breath both catch in his throat--and then he knows what he can do to make sure Stahn knows he's entirely committed now. He shifts for a moment out of Stahn's lap (perhaps a bit alarmingly, though he doesn't mean to), but only long enough to properly strip himself of the remainder of his pants. And then... he'll return to where he was, gingerly straddling Stahn.
The position's incredibly intimate. It already had felt that way, but like this, it feels even more so. Leon feels... a little vulnerable, especially with Stahn still half-clothed, but he trusts Stahn with that, so even if he has to swallow tightly as he settles himself carefully back in Stahn's lap, he otherwise doesn't tense up.
It's a huge step--but it's one he's willing to take with Stahn.]
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and it's honestly something that's captivating to him. he knows how much he loves leon, how attracted he is to him—so being able to see him at his most vulnerable is something that's honestly kind of breathtaking. leon... leon really trusts him completely, he has to in order to be willing to do this. it's a bit touching and almost overwhelming in a sense, because the pure amount of trust that leon has in him tugs at his heart a bit. but that's not all that's on his mind, not when he can fully see leon—and it just makes him want leon more.
so when leon regains his position nestled against's stahn's body, the first thing stahn does isn't make an effort to explore these new parts. it's to cup leon's cheeks in his hands and share a warm, deep kiss with him. stahn's overwhelmed right now in the sense that this is all so new, in that he wants leon so much; even if they're both feeling their way through this and trying to figure out all the right beats along the way, there's no question in his mind that this is right.]
I... [he breaths an utterance against leon's lips when he pulls back, and in some sort of haze he realizes he's about to finish that sentence with words that don't need saying right now. "i love you," really does sit as the edge of his tongue, so stahn decides to silence the words with actions, kissing leon again. and this time, his hands wander, touching leon's skin gently, trailing down his neck to his chest and back to his hips.
things can't stay this way though; stahn is still half-clothed, and it's unfair. so he moves his hand to pull it back towards himself to unbuckle his belt...
but in doing so, his hand accidentally raises the stakes on intimacy as it grazes leon along the way.
—and stahn is immediately unsure of whether to acknowledge that or to press forward with what he was doing, so he tenses, just slightly.]
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Leon melts into the kiss, because it's safe and familiar and 100% Stahn being Stahn, and that's something he can handle. He knows he wants the rest as well, he does, but it's also all new to him, and it's hard not to be nervous and a little uncertain of exactly where they're going from here, or exactly what they're going to do.
Leon trusts Stan--he trusts him with everything, as his current vulnerable position makes very clear--but he still wants this to go well, and it's hard not to be a little nervous about the fact that he's completely new to this. Even knowing Stahn is as well... Leon doesn't like being oblivious or incompetent.
But Stahn just kisses him, and then again, and Leon kisses back, thoroughly and entirely pliantly, focused completely on that, so when Stahn's hand grazes against him, he's really not prepared for it at all. There's a choked off noise that he makes into the kiss, before he breaks away from it to breathe out a shuddering breath, even as a shiver goes down his spine. It wasn't even that much, honestly--just a touch, just a slight graze--but it's a promise of something else, and something completely new, and between the two of those things, it's pretty overwhelming.
But it hasn't missed his own notice that his hips shifted forward too, despite himself, searching for more than just a light graze, and Leon breathes out another shuddering breath before he has to accept that for all of his uncertainties (and Stahn's as well), their bodies know what they want--and he's not going to hold back, not after he made such a demonstration of telling Stahn not to do so.
So instead, he lifts his head again to press his lips to Stahn's, lingering and thorough, even as he reaches with his hands to slide his fingers lightly around Stahn's back and down to slip somewhat beneath his belt and pants as well. He doesn't want to get in the way of Stahn fumbling with his pants, but he does want to make it clear that he's ready to go forward with this--at least, as far forward as they know what they're doing.]
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[he mumbles against leon's lips. though the apology isn't really so much for the touch at all—that really isn't going to be the last of these actions tonight, right? so he knows he doesn't need to say sorry for it. the word comes for startling him that way, since it wasn't really intended to happen just yet.
but that's all it's for, and stahn is thoroughly unapologetic for the rest. it's why his kisses are still relentless, even when he has to pause to breathe against leon's mouth from the overload of sensations all over his body. the excitement coils in the pit of his stomach, like nervous butterflies, but in the best possible way. it's amplified once more by the deliberate way that leon presses against him, though he's also mentally cursing the fact that he's still partially clothed and unable to wholly feel leon's skin against his own.
because that's what he wants. he wants all of leon now, even if it's a little awkward, even if he's not exactly sure what they'll do once they get beyond this point. somehow, it doesn't seem to matter because he just knows he needs to listen to what his body tells him to do. that's why he shifts to completely unbuckle his belt, with minor fumbling from the way his hands just barely tremble from the intensity of it all. where leon's hands have shifted excites him all the more, his body almost jerkily reacting to it with a small thrusting of his hips.
he doesn't want to wait much more, not with this much still separating them, so stahn isn't wasting much time to start tugging a little at his own pants...
though it's admittedly hard for him to focus on when he's also shifting his kisses to trace leon's jawline at the very same time.
there's so much that stahn wants, so much he wants to feel and experience, so much that he wants to do with leon, so much that he wants to do in order to prove that leon's trust has been put in the right place. and because it's so much, he's not really able to focus on doing more than one thing at a time here—nobody's ever looked at stahn to be a master of multitasking, after all, and with his mind in this haze of desire, he's probably just a little worse than usual.]
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Stahn presses his hips forward in short, small movements and Leon isn't prepared for the friction that provides, even if the movements are still pretty gentle as of now. The sensations are intense and new and overwhelming and Leon can't even control the way that his short shuddering breaths become gasps which become groans, each motion sending so many sensations through his body.
And Stahn is still clothed.
Too much, anyway, because his shirt is off, yes, but Leon has seen Stahn shirtless before. He wants to see Stahn in the same position he's in, he wants to feel Stahn's skin against his, he wants to see what this will feel like without that added barrier of clothing between them.
But Stahn fumbles, and Leon grumbles into the kisses, and it's far too far into this for him to fret about things now.
No...now he doesn't care so much anymore, not with the sensations coursing through his body, so he takes charge, shifting Stahn's hands away so he can firmly move his way into removing that belt properly and moving his fingers to tug gently at his pants.
He could pull them down now...but he waits just a moment, pulling away from the kisses just long enough to meet Stahn's eyes, flushed and disheveled and undoubtedly excited, but still solemn.
He won't keep going until Stahn is ready, that's what that face says, even if he doesn't have the breath for words.]
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suddenly, it's leon taking charge of the situation—something that seems to be both expected and yet unexpected all at once. leon's always been good at commanding situations; it's something stahn admires about him wholly... and maybe he expected that at some point, leon would take the initiative.
but at the same token, stahn had been the one leading them this way, pushing and pushing until leon was ready, and doing his best to try not to fumble through something so new. but now leon's hands are on his belt, so dangerously close to grazing him through what little cloth remains, and then he's tugging. leon is eager, as eager as he is... and somehow, that's even more of a turn-on than stahn could have ever prepared himself for. but then comes that moment where he's pulling back, looking to stahn for some kind of consent to move forward and he can't help but to feel warmed by it. every action between them so so careful and cautious but in the best way. just as stahn had wanted to make sure that leon's been ready every step of the way, leon is doing just the same for him.
he looks a little overwhelmed, with pink cheeks and raw, red lips, and hair that looks decidedly disheveled compared to how he normally carries himself. it's cute, it's attracive... it's everything. and stahn wants every last bit of that for himself.
so with his hands now freed up, he rests one right at leon's groin carefully, while the other traces up his body until his hand cups leon's cheek. it only remains that way for a brief moment before stahn is pushing some of that hair away from his face, lazily offering a smile... and then pressing a slightly wet kiss where leon's jaw meets his ear before finally speaking—a husk that's barely above a whisper directly into leon's ear, like a secret meant only for him.]
I'm okay... you can keep going.
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Stahn being like this... Stahn so easily offering that lazy smile, Stahn kissing him like that, whispering like that--there's nothing innocent at all about that sort of response, and it almost leaves Leon's entire brain blank (probably because honestly? That blood is rushing elsewhere else real fast). He swallows tightly in response, breathing out a shuddering breath and managing nothing more than a shaky nod.
He can keep going.
Which is good, because he definitely didn't want to stop now, not with how Stahn looks like this, not with how very thoroughly aroused Leon feels, and he knows Stahn feels the same--
And so he doesn't hesitate to make those intentions very clear. Leon's more dramatic than Stahn, though; even not knowing exactly what he's doing here, he has enough of a flair for the dramatic to do this in a way that seems proper to him. And so he slides one hand up into Stan's hair, holding his head in place as he presses their lips together and lingers, thoroughly tasting everything Stahn has to offer, and trying his best to keep him occupied.
It's a little trickier to remove Stahn's pants with one hand, but if nothing else, Leon's always been pretty precise; he tugs at Stahn's pants rather nimbly with his free hand, sliding them down from one side and then the other with clear intent. And Stahn is under him, too, which makes it even trickier--but he's willing to lift his hips just long enough to tug those pants down further.]
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it's hard for stahn to focus at all when leon kisses him in such a tantalizing way. it's so easy to get engrossed in the feeling of leon's lips, of the way is own tingle from how long they've been doing this, and the sweet, familiar taste that he can't get enough of. he's a little light-headed from all the excitement—there's little doubt that so much blood has been rushing elsewhere that it's dizzying.
but all the same, leon is being... well, impressively leon. maneuvering one-handed so skillfully; it's almost difficult to tell that he's never done this before. he's certainly a bit smoother than stahn, and his motions feel confident and so distinctly leon that stahn can't help but feel more aroused by every last bit of his actions.
when leon lifts his hips, he feels the pressure and the friction ease and stahn can't help but to exhale a breath; it's probably the only reprieve his overloaded brain has had in a few minutes (not that he's complaining), though it's probably not a bad thing. stahn is a quick enough learner to know what to do next, pressing a bit of weight from his hand against leon's thigh and drawing the other away from his face to press into the matress. he can use that support to shift, lifting himself in a way that's inviting enough for leon to be able to further tug his pants down.
please. stahn is begging silently as he seeks leon's lips again. he wants this. he wants this a lot, to be able to feel every last inch of leon against his skin, and for leon to feel him in just the same way. maybe it's not even want, it's need, and he desperately feels like he's never needed anything in his life more than every bit of leon.]
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But the rest of his mind is very much occupied with the need to pull Stahn's pants down the rest of the way--which is something he's able to accomplish when Stahn lifts himself, pulling the pants down as far as he possibly can. He can't strip Stahn completely from this position, but he was more than able to pull those pants down far enough to expose Stahn completely, just like Leon, and he's not going to worry about the rest.
He can't worry about the rest, because then he's settling himself back into Stahn's lap, and in the process, their hips press together just like this, no barriers between them, and the noise Leon makes when he pulls away from the kiss is choked and pleased, because this is what they were undeniably working towards.
And it's still so much more than he could have ever anticipated. Leon's hands slide from Stahn's hair to just wrap around his back, at a loss for what else to do with them; there's a lot still they have to figure out from here, but what Leon knows for sure is that he wants Stahn to stay this close, even if he knows nothing else.
But now, both naked and pressed together like this, they're certainly teetering right on the edge of something bigger, and Leon is ready, but he also wants to make sure that it's something they do and decide upon together--which is why he licks his lips and swallows, and meets Stahn's eyes firmly.
It's clear, really, even as his breathing is ragged and his face is flushed--
What now?
Because Leon would probably be willing to do just about anything--and he'd be willing to take charge as well, he thinks, but it's something he wants to confirm with Stahn first.]
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he's enjoying every kiss and every touch as they fumble their way through this, and stahn can tell from the way leon moves that he's enjoying it too. even if they're both unsure of what comes next, of what they're doing it and just trying to feel it all out as they progress... it's truly the first time he's sure they both feel completely ready to take this next step together.
one of the things stahn knows though is that he doesn't want anything between them; even if his pants are pulled down enough to expose him fully and allow for direct contact, he's not completely stripped yet. the other thing he knows is that he doesn't, for any reason, want to break this contact with leon at all. the way they're pressed together, the invigorating, exciting feeling of friction and touch that makes his heart race—he doesn't want that to stop for even a single moment.
so even as leon looks at him, questioning further consent, seeking out something.. he's trying to work out the best course of action himself. his own breathing his ragged, his cheeks are flushed, and though it can't be seen, beads of sweat are already forming at his hairline—but there's a glint of excitement in his eyes even as he also looks... not entirely sure of what to do.
time to wing it.
a hand finds its way to leon's waist, the other to the middle of his back, and stahn is lowering himself to lay flat on the bed. in this way, he can feel the entirety of leon's weight against him—which between two kisses causes him to breathe in very sharply. but the position of his hands doesn't last—he seeks out one of leon's and tries to guide it towards his pants. this way, they could strip the remainder of his clothes with only minor weight shifting, and leon can still be directly on top of him. it gives them both a little bit of control as they try to figure out what comes next.
...which, well—that's the part stahn is most unsure of, honestly. he's never done this, not with anyone, and while he knows what the end result should be, all the pleasurable steps in getting there are the parts he doesn't know how to approach. he wants to see leon, feel him, touch him, taste him—in just about every way, but there still is that sense of apprehension for how to actually do that.]
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Namely by how as Stahn pulls them to a laying position on the bed, Leon ends up shifting naturally along with it, trying to make the movement not too startling or too much--
But because of that, he ends up basically grinding his hips against Stahn's.
It's done lightly at first, an entirely accidental movement of hips against hips, but the jolt of pleasure it sends right down Leon's spine gets him to react automatically, even before his brain can entirely catch up.
He rolls his hips forward again, pressing them against Stahn's and searching out more of that sensation, breathing catching and shuddering, a low groan escaping him as he does.
There's a small portion of his brain still working--it acknowledges that Stahn wants and needs his pants pulled off the remainder of the way. But he fumbles as he tries to do so, uncharacteristically, because it's so much--so much intensity, so much more sensation and feeling than Leon had ever really thought could be, and seeing Stahn disheveled and naked beneath him is simply the metaphorical icing on the cake.
Leon's body knows what it wants if nothing else, and it's Stahn--moreso even than he was ever prepared for, more than he ever acknowledged.
It'll take a moment for his brain to boot back up to be sure.]
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there was literally no way for stahn to be prepared for any of that.
the weight and the friction without any movement had been intense enough as it was. but then leon rolls his hips, and rolls them again and stahn feels completely blindsided by the intensity of the pleasure. he hisses out a breath that's accompanied by a groan all his own, and almost instinctively, it seems as if his body knows to comply.
the thought of removing the rest of his pants is a bit lost, even as leon seems to fumble to do so (does stahn even notice? he doesn't seem to), and the hand that's on his back tenses until his fingers seem to dig into the skin a bit. it's intense, sending shivers directly through stahn in the best way possible. of course, along with this is the fact that trying to figure out what comes next also seems lost on him. leon's taken the lead in a way that stahn didn't expect, and his own body is reacting accordingly in some sort of synchronization; his hips lift, his knees pull up until his feet can be more grounded in the mattress, and then his hips roll with a little more force, pressing hard against leon's body.
his kisses a little sloppier this way, and it seems like they've looped back around into being a little more thoughtless in their actions—but how can stahn think when everything feels so good? he's never once wavered in wanting every last bit of leon, and now that it's here, it's nearly impossible for him to hold back at all. does he even need to use his head right now? his other hand starts to slip away from trying to guide leon's, though where he's going with it, even stahn himself isn't sure—at this point, he's just going to do whatever feels good.
(though at this point, everything feels good, because the person on top of him is leon, the one he wants most in this world in every sense of the word.)]
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Leon does manage to mostly finagle Stahn's pants off, but they're still not off all the way--he doesn't manage that before Stahn's shifting to press against him with more force in turn, and then all thoughts of pants and removing them are completely gone from Leon's brain.
Everything is. Everything but Stahn underneath him, Stahn pressing up against him, Stahn sending waves of pleasure coursing through him with every movement of his body, and all Leon can do is try to meet him, try to embrace it and enjoy it.
For once in his life, he's not thinking about anything beyond his own enjoyment, and Stahn's as well--no thoughts of duty, or concerns about what he should be doing, or thoughts on anything but Stahn, and Stahn's body, and the slightly awkward way they fit together until Leon manages to shift again, trying to find some sort of rhythm that is less jilting and awkward.
His success is a bit up in the air, but he's trying, at least--as much as he can with how little he has left in the way of mental processes.
He barely feels Stahn's hand at his back, and between the kisses as the friction, Leon's really not sure what to do with his own hands either, not now that they're lying down. He plants one on the bed next to Stahn's head, steadying himself a little, but the other...he's not really sure. He doesn't have a lot in the way of guidance here, and Stahn seems equally uncertain, and it's really hard to think when Stahn's body is moving that way beneath him--so ultimately he just buries those fingers into Stahn's hair, tilting his head a little more to allow Leon to press his lips to Stahn's neck, though it's a mix of shuddering, short breaths just as much as it is actually kisses at this point.]
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not that he's complaining.
not that he even could complain.
but he feels like maybe he should be doing more. when the kisses are being pressed to his neck, it leaves stahn with little more to do than keeping up a rhythm with the movement of his hips and the way he's pressing himself against leon with such deliberate intent. he isn't thinking of much at all... just that there need to be something more to go along with this. but stahn can't think at all like this, so all he can do is what his body seems to want.
and what his body wants is more of leon's body.
so with one hand on leon's back, edging downwards past the small of his back and over leon's bottom, the other... well, the other is going elsewhere. it's a surprising careful motion, the way stahn juts his hips a little, but still shifts to allow space before his hand grasps them both, his touch gentle but firm, and yet also cautious and tentative. for himself, it immediately intensifies the senstations felt, but he doesn't do anything else, breathing out shakily and waiting for some kind of sign of approval from leon.]
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And then Stahn takes things to the next level and proves Leon's poor imagination wrong.
When Stahn's hand enters the mix, Leon stills, breathing in sharply against Stahn's neck. For Stahn, it intensifies the sensations felt, and that is completely and totally true of Leon as well. But even more than that, Leon's distinctly aware that it's Stahn's hand that's holding him like this, and it's Stahn's other hand moving lower along his back as well, and it's so intensely intimate that for a moment, despite everything, despite their positions...
It's this that gets Leon's face to burn a little, even as he buries it against the crook of Stahn's neck, and he knows it's ridiculous to be embarrassed by this of all things, but he is. On the other hand... he also has no willpower, so shallowly, despite his embarrassment and the way he hides his face, he begins to move again, at first shallowly thrusting his hips almost cautiously into Stahn's touch and against Stahn further, breathing out a rasping breath that's more a soft noise of pleasure than anything.
It's a Lot, and he wasn't entirely prepared, but he doesn't want it to stop either, that's for sure.]
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he shudders a breath out when he feels that thrust of leon's hips; doing so while they're both in his hand and he can feel the heat of their bodies mingling against his skin almost makes it hard for him to contain himself. for a moment, he holds his breath, but when he exhales, there's a very audible groan of pleasure—maybe it's not so surprising that in the heat of the moment, stahn would be the louder of the two.
he won't let leon do all the work though. even as he rolls his hips against stahn's hand, he takes it as a welcoming sign and his grip tightens slightly before he slowly starts to make a vague stroking motion. his other hand is gripping at the backside flesh. it's likely that leon can feel the dampening of stahn's skin—the intensity of everything that's happening is just heating his already, naturally warm body to new levels.
stahn can barely breathe, he can't think at all, but yet when the next groan escapes his throat, it has a single word rasped out with the very same tone.]
Emilio... [it a groan of his true name, entirely with a sound of intimacy, of ecstasy that is buried deep within it. it's throaty and comes with absolutely no thought at all; even what he manages to say right now is pure instinct and desire.]
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Stahn's the louder of the two of them, because Stahn's always been the louder of the two of them, but Leon's quickly losing the battle to stay quiet as well, sharp breaths turning into quiet, pleased noises with each shift of his hips.
There's the thought that he should be doing more for Stahn as well--that he wants to be more for Stahn, that he wants Stahn to be enjoying himself as well, and even if he is (and it's pretty clear he is, from the way he's groaning to the way Leon can feel his hair growing damp with sweat from their efforts), Leon still wants there to be more.
There's not a lot he can do in this position, not that immediately crosses his mind, and especially not as the majority of his brain power and physical efforts are taken up by their current rhythm--but even so, he's able to dip his head just that little bit lower, moving his somewhat uncoordinated and sloppy kisses from the crook of Stahn's neck down to his shoulder, and then his upper chest--
Which is as far as he gets when Stahn manages to groan his name in that tone of voice, and it's not Leon, it's Emilio, which is a name that means a lot for Leon to hear even at a normal time. But hearing that name in that tone of voice is obscene, and Leon wasn't prepared; his entire body shudders at that, and for a moment he forgets how to breathe, face pressed into Stahn's chest as if to muffle the very audible groan that he's not able to muffle at all. Between the foreplay, the energetic exploration of each other's bodies like this and the constant friction Stahn's provided, Leon really never stood a chance, not when these sensations are all entirely new.
Especially when Stahn's saying his real name in a tone of voice so intimate, so raw and carnal, and something about it tugs at Leon's heart even more than his physical body, knowing that when Stahn's following his instincts, and not thinking at all, when he's embracing Leon and all that he is--it's that name that escapes him.]
Sta--
[But really, Leon doesn't even manage all of Stahn's name in return; he manages to breathe out the start of it before it just melds into a wordless groan even as he inevitably loses it, body trembling and face still very much hidden and buried against Stahn's chest. That was a lot in very quick succession, and he is very much overwhelmed.]
no subject
his hand moves in rhythm (or it tries to, but stahn himself is having a hard time staying coordinated when he feels like this) with their motions. but there's definitely no brainpower here, it's all instinct and trying to move with his desire while making leon feel as good as he does.
he can feel the warmth and the tension quickly coiling, though he doesn't consider much of the implications here at all. he's just moving in rhythm, neck craning at where leon is kissing until suddenly he's not. it's so sudden, really, how he hears leon start to say his name before his body shudders and trembles in succession. his own hand is still moving without much aim or aggression, just working with rhythm.
—but then he feels it on his fingers, the warmth and the wetness, and the realization hits him hard and fast. the innate knowing he succeeded, that he was able to bring leon to some kind of climax despite having no idea what he was doing—well, that's overwhelming for stahn too. the sensations had already been quite a lot, and trying to maintain his own composure proves to be too much with the newly added lubrication.
so his whole body tenses in that moment, toes curling into the mattress as he chokes out another guttural groan. after a few seconds, his body untenses and he heaves a few heavy, labored breaths. truthfully, he's the messier one here and now, and they're both likely going to need to bathe once they've recovered. but recovered, stahn certainly isn't, if the way his hand lingers between them for a few moments before he lets go and goes a bit limp is any indication.]
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Stahn, in the heat of the moment, entirely unaware of what he'd been saying and working off of nothing but instinct, had called him Emilio. Of all of the names, of all of the things he could have said or did in that moment--
He'd called Leon by the name he'd given to Stahn to safeguard and keep, and there's something warming about how important Stahn must think of that name. He'd really like nothing more than to--well, curl a little closer to Stahn, and share his appreciation in some way, still fuzzily content as he's feeling, but Leon's a bit too fastidious for that even in moments like this, and they're both a little sticky and gross. So instead he rolls off of Stahn in a rather inelegant movement for Leon, though he still sticks rather close, tucking himself into Stahn's side instead, head slightly tucked away so his messy and sweaty bangs hide it from view and resting there for a moment.
That seems to be all he's capable of at the moment, though.
There will be a lot to think about after the fact, but right now? All Leon can feel is warm, and loved, and satisfied, because honestly, this has been a really long time in coming, and they've waited so long for it, and even with how it went, Leon's nothing but content right now.]
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somehow, it's like he and leon and completely entwined this way—it has its own strange meaning to it despite also being disgusting enough to warrant a bath for sure, because he knows that he can't go to sleep this way.
despite the state of mind, he finds himself smiling as he catches his breath—and not because of what happened. it's because leon still says so close to him. it's because he trusted stahn enough to be so intimate. because he didn't hesitate even once, and he didn't balk at the fact that stahn fumbled on more than one occasion just trying to please him.]
...Are you okay? [he'll break the silence once he's regained enough of his composure to do so, but he has to ask. things escalated quickly, and he hardly had time to make sure he was okay in any sort of coherent state throughout that. even to the end, stahn had been experimenting and pushing limits until things came to pretty quick finish.
he can assume that leon is okay with things as they were because he remains close, but he still wants to make sure in words. it's not the only gesture though, of course, because the hand that isn't wet and sticky is brushing leon's hair a bit with his fingers—not forcing him to look up or anything like that, but idly straightening the damp, disheveled strands.]
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After all they just went through, after everything they did together, Stahn wants to know...if he's okay? Of course he is. He's more than okay, really--he can't remember the last time he felt this plainly satisfied, and the lingering euphoric haze shows no signs of dissipating. Doing something like this... something that he purely and simply enjoyed with Stahn, someone he truly and completely loves--
It's new.
It's new and it's wonderful, and Leon sorts gently under his breath at the question and shifts just enough to look up at Stahn through that somewhat tidied hair. Now that the sweat is drying in the cooler air, he's aware that he's a little chilly, naked as he is--so even as he does answer, he's tucking himself closer to Stahn the personal space heater.]
...Naturally. [Bravado!!! How...Leon-esque. He clears his throat.] There was...nothing unenjoyable about that situation.
[That's the most stilted way to say he enjoyed himself ever, but there you have it. He enjoyed himself.
He is still peering up at Stahn though, as if waiting for Stahn's verdict too--he's just trying to not look too interested or too anxious about it. But it really does matter to him, no matter what he says or how he acts.]
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[there's an honest sense of relief that makes stahn breath a bit easier, especially as he feels leon tucking himself closer. even with his body not longer as hot or worked up, he's still incredibly warm; his fire is a little too natural in that way sometimes.
he looks at leon with a warm, almost goofy smile from his euphoria. really, he wants to lean down and kiss the top of leon's head, but he's struggling to find a way to do that without moving too much; he definitely doesn't want to make a mess of the sheets. they're already kind of sweaty (especially given how stahn's body temperature is; his hair is sticking to literally every piece of skin it comes in contact with), so making it worse is probably a bad idea.
fortunately enough for leon though, stahn has no qualms saying what's on his mind too.]
It felt... really good for me too. [not that his cheeks won't visibly flush from the sheepish feeling that comes with admitting that. they've done something so intimate, but even though he has no qualms saying it to express it for leon's sake...
well, it's still strange.] Really, really good.
[better than he could have ever expected, so much so that he's still a bit overwhelmed by how strongly he feels about it.]
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Even if there's a part of him that does want to get cleaned up, even if he's not quite as much of a mess as poor Stahn is. He just isn't fond of not being clean.
For now, though, that problem is put away, because...well, Stahn's talking, so Leon lifts his head slightly to look at him instead, and the way he speaks about it is so goofy, which means it's utterly ridiculous that it sends a flush of warmth through him, that same warmth coiling a bit in his stomach.
He's sincerely glad, though, he knows that much. That Stahn enjoyed himself as much as Leon did, that it was as pleasurable for him... that's important. It's very important, so Leon won't even prevaricate much. Instead, he just sighs and rests his head back on Stahn's shoulder.]
...Good.
[That's what really matters, and...that's all he really wanted out of this. The fact that it was that good for the both of them--doesn't that mean that even if they didn't really know what they were doing, it was a success? And that just makes him even more pleased. But he's satisfied with all of that, which means that he falls silent again after that little bit, basking in the warm feelings still lingering.]
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