realpolitik | Leon Magnus | Stahn Aileron

Entry tags:

Leon Magnus | Stahn Aileron | 071

[this is a catch-all for boyfriends

here's a list

- ice cream ✓
- seasickness
- stahn sacrifice ✓
- reunion: judas ✓
- taming stahn's hair ✓
- piggyback rides ✓
- just imagine
- family dinner
- why is there pow hammer
- possessive leon
- apologies
- post-barbatos afterlife meeting
- AND MORE]

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Mm... [it's a quiet grunt of affirmation, followed by a much briefer kiss to the corner of leon's mouth before he speaks again.]

...Then I won't. [there's something almost carnal about the way he says it, and he'll barely give leon any time to react before he makes his next move.

it's fiery, sloppy crash of his lips against leon's, baring teeth and heavy breaths.

but that's not where it stops.

his hands slide to leon's waist to pull him closer, all the same making the motions to fall backwards on the bed properly; he's horizontal and keeping leon on top of him while doing his best to not break the intensity of his kisses. if leon tells him to let go, if leon tells him not to hold back, this is the sort of position they end up in.

and it doesn't take long for his hands to wander either, feeling leon's form, seeking out skin—anything he can get without pushing the limit too far.]

[Leon did ask for this, after all, and every part of it works together to be...something Leon likes. There are so many ways Stahn could've done this that would have put Leon on edge--if Stahn had fallen on top of him, for instance, instead of falling beneath him. There's no reason for Leon to tense up here.

Instead, he has a prime view of Stahn beneath him, before their lips are locked again, and then there's nothing else to see.

Not that he really needs to.

No, he doesn't need to see anything at all, not when Stahn's fingers are trailing along his skin, Leon's shirt hitched up a bit to allow Stahn's searching fingers to find that skin. It makes him shudder, those featherlight touches almost overly sensitive, when it's something he's honestly been waiting for and yet could never really be prepared for.

Leon's not going to be telling him to hold back.

Leon's not going to be saying much of anything, really, because Leon is Occupied.

His fingers bury themselves in Stahn's hair, but his free hand drifts down to Stahn's side, fingers grasping at his side, reaching for skin as well, though he can't find it yet, not with how Stahn's shirt is. He's still trying, but he's also otherwise occupied.

With the kiss.

He returns it with equal fire, equal enthusiasm, and even more intensity, taking his advantage in being on top of Stahn to lean over him, bangs framing Stahn's face as he does.]

[the fact that leon doesn't hesitate at all feels like a welcoming invitation. the way he kisses back, the way he shudders at stahn's touch but continues, the way his own hands seem to be searching for skin—for the first time, it really feels like they're in a position they're both ready to be in.

stahn's held back for a while, he's waited for leon to give him the okay to go. and even though stahn is still clumsy in his motions—\from the excitement, the passion and the inexperience—he doesn't seem to stop. his lips are slotted against leon's enough, sometimes pulling back to suck on leon's lip, sometimes to sloppily kiss his jaw when he's pulling back just enough to breathe.

all the while, his hands are finding their way beneath leon's shirt, feeling the increasing warmth to his skin. he seeks out whatever he can reach—back, chest, torso—and trying to commit the feeling of leon's body to his memory. he's waited so long, he's wanted to badly to just have every part of leon and his body to himself. he's not going to give it up, not even as his body shifts.

stahn's back arches a little and he slides downward just a bit to loosen his shirt from where it's tucked, giving leon an opportunity to do the same and seek out skin. his leg slides up a bit between leon's leg's, seeking a more suitable position, since it's clear that neither of them plans to stop what they're doing quite yet.

from his throat escapes a groan, one that is pleased, that is excited, that is soaking in every last moment of what is happening.]

[It figures that he needs Stahn to help him with his stupid shirt.

Leon has enough brainpower to spare an irritated thought for that, frowning slightly to himself, but then Stahn's lips are on his again and he doesn't really have any time to frown at all.

Not that he's complaining.

Instead he follows what little instinct he has in this area, shifting to press flush against Stahn's chest, moving with Stahn's movements. All he knows is that he doesn't want to be far away, so if Stahn's going to shift and move, sliding his leg between Leon's, Leon won't hesitate to allow it.

On the other hand, as much as he doesn't mind Stahn taking charge (it's a personality trait that he honestly doesn't mind at all coming from Stahn), he's not exactly happy settling back and letting it happen. Granted, he has no idea what he's doing, but he doesn't care about that, either; all that matters is that he can press forward, tongue tasting at Stahn's lips, even as his fingers slide beneath Stahn's shirt to run along his spine.

Everything is suddenly happening just a little too quickly, but Leon's more than happy to be part of the experience--he has no intentions of just being along for the ride, because he wants to lay his claim to Stahn just as much as the reverse. And if he can pull Stahn's shirt up further in the process, well, that's hardly something to complain about. (Abs)]

[it's more fair this way, a mutual expression of their feelings—but it's definitely a lot and very quickly. stahn's mind hasn't caught up to what his body is doing, and while that's fine for now, it does mean he'll fumble in his motions a little, clumsy in the way he shifts.

some of those motions are a bit jerky—the sudden way in which he arches his back when he feels leon's fingers trailing his spine. he can't help the way he suddenly breaks the kiss to shudder an aroused breath and swallow thickly, or how his head turns just a bit before pushes himself to to angle kisses down leon's jawline until he's close enough to get another taste of leon's lips.

neither of them has much of a clue, and stahn's mind is clouded by desire and impulse. he isn't thinking of much at all right now; not a single thought seems to be conscious beyond the feeling of enjoying what's happening. the kisses are heated and almost desperate—it's impossible to deny that all the holding back that stahn has done for leon's sake is practically seeping out of him bit-by-bit, unable to be contained.

his hands memorize the contours of leon's body, seeking to never forget any scars or raised marks, any birthmarks, anything that isn't just the smoothness of his skin. his hands move up until the tips of his fingers can trace the protrusion of his collarbone, then slowly drag down until they can just barely tease and working their way under leon's beltline.

there's no thought, just wants. wants and more wants, and until either leon stops him or his own inability to quickly decide what comes next gets to him, stahn doesn't plan on giving it up. right now, he wants all of leon for himself.]

[Some of these movements and actions are entirely new for them.

Not for a lack of trying, admittedly, but there's aways something, it felt like. Always something that interrupted, always something that got in the way, and they never quite got this far. So it truly is A Lot; Stahn's fingers slide under his beltline and Leon makes a choked off noise, one that's both startled and pleased in equal measure. Touch like this... it's new to the both of them in so many ways, but his brain hasn't caught up enough to realize that it might be a little too much, and so Leon's main focus really is on just getting more of it.

So his fingers trail from Stahn's back to his front (abs), exploring as well, getting to really touch and examine and learn Stahn's body for the first time, and he enjoys it. It's something that feels very right, even if his movements are equally unpolished and occasionally fumbling--there's at least no hesitation whatsoever, despite their general newness. Shifting with Stahn's movements means he ends up pressed against the leg between his legs, and his breath catches a little at that as well, caught off guard as he is.

But the desperation in the kisses is impossible to miss, but it's also impossible to not reciprocate. Everything about this situation is overwhelming in the best of ways, so he keeps one hand buried in Stahn's hair, perhaps an eternal fascination while also a way to keep his head in place, even as he matches Stahn kiss for messy and intense kiss.

At some point, maybe, their brains will catch up with them, but it sure hasn't happened yet.]

[the fact that they're both so unpolished in their actions, that there's a bit of fumbling as they try to feel things out makes stahn a bit more at ease with it—like a somewhat subconscious confirmation that leon wants this as much as he does, but also that they're still treading new and unfamiliar territory.

he moves into leon's touches with every movement, each kiss more desperate and fervent than the last. he can't stop, because he thinks that if he stops, something will interrupt them and this will all be put on the backburner once more.

he doesn't want that, not now. not when he wants this. not when leon wants it. not when he can feel the warmth of leon's skin against his, feeling and memorizing just as he'd been doing. and for stahn, with his fingers below leon's beltline, he's feeling hipbones, letting his palms rest right on the protrusion and letting the very tips of his fingers graze the completely unfamiliar territory. stahn won't go further than that just yet.

but through his kisses, in muted, hushed and breathy tones, he asks a question.]

Are... you...

Still okay...?

[stahn's definitely breathless and completely engrossed in leon's body and every last kiss, but he still can't help but to ask. he doesn't know how far this is or isn't going to go, but even in this hazy state, he can't ignore that he may push leon too far if he only acts on his carnal desires.]

[He's really not.

Okay, that is--he's overwhelmed in the best of ways. He feels like he's both light-headed and can't gasp in enough air no matter how ragged his breathing gets. He feels like he might not be able to ever learn to breathe properly again, not when Stahn's fingertips trail along his hipbones and the tender skin beneath, and he shudders despite himself, giving up on tracing Stahn's skin himself in favor of grasping almost helplessly at Stahn's hair, his shirt, his skin, possibly leaving light scratches in his almost desperation.

He's not okay, because this is so much more than anything he could have ever thought it would be. Even knowing what was coming in those evenings of grasping at clothing and deep, thorough kisses, even knowing the concept behind what they're technically working towards--

His mind is blank now, almost blissfully so, because it's still so much more.

His breath shudders, even as he opens his mouth to try to respond. But Stahn's fingers still graze beneath his beltline, and every single kiss leaves Leon even more breathless and headily swamped by what he wants, so Stahn's going to need a moment if he wants an actual response out of Leon that isn't just unsteady breathing and fingers tight in his shirt and hair.]

[he's not sure he's ever felt this kind of reaction from leon, either. the way his hair gets tugged at the scalp with desperate force, the way he can actually feel nails scratching him, though hardly enough to break the skin.

but it's so passionate and forceful and tears down every remaining wall that remains. or at least, it comes close to that.

but stahn knows there's still one more barrier that needs to be crossed, and as much as they're in the heat of the moment, he won't do anything else until leon actually consents to it. he doesn't want to push him beyond his limits, especially not when... well, honestly? he has no idea what he's going to do. but his fingers are still teasing, playing lightly at those sensitive patches of skin below the belt, and his kisses are relentless. they're warm but fiery, never stopping for any longer than enough for leon to try and squeeze out a few words when he's ready to.

stahn's body is ready to keep going further, something that leon can undoubtedly feel just from the way he's positioned on top of him; his mind is fogged by thoughts of nothing but leon all the same. they certainly go hand-in-hand, because what stahn wants is leon. he knows... he knows that regardless of how they classify themselves, they're in love. he knows that he has leon's heart.

but right now, he wants the rest of leon too.]

[Leon could probably quite happily just go with this, not speak any words and roll with whatever it is Stahn wants. Wherever Stahn takes this. For all of Leon's tendencies to be demanding and want to be in charge as well, sometimes he's finding that it's easier for him to just...allow Stahn to do what he wants most.

But naturally, Stahn won't allow that.

Leon's breath catches with every movement of Stahn's fingers, which is making it really hard to respond still, but he's not oblivious to the fact that they've stalled. The kisses are fantastic still, and Stahn's fingers are a distraction that can't be stopped, but...

Stahn's waiting for his answer, isn't he?

So after a moment, Leon rallies himself and musters all of his willpower, pulling away just far enough to make it clear that he's not going to be kissing Stahn back for a moment, though his fingers remain buried in Stahn's hair. His other hand frees itself from Stahn's poor, wrinkled shirt to almost shockingly gently cup his cheek, running a finger along the arch of his cheekbone almost wonderingly.

Even now... even when they're this far, even when it's clear exactly what Stahn wants--even now, he asks, and even now he waits for Leon to guarantee that he's fine. It's incredible.

And it's why Stahn has Leon's heart so thoroughly.]

Yes. I'm fine. [His breathing is still ragged enough that the words are hoarse, but Leon doesn't seem regretful or embarrassed in the least; he shifts a little, arching his back and hips just enough to almost encourage Stahn, trying to get a bit more of that touch.]

I told you--you don't have to hold back all the time. [He leans forward then, pressing their lips together slowly and thoroughly.

He wants this too.]

[there's a truth to the fact that stahn isn't really prepared for the route leon chooses to take with this. despite their labored breathing and how they intermingle, despite the way his heart races and the way the blood is flowing so far from his brain to just about everywhere else to the point where it's almost dizzying...

he still couldn't be prepared for it.

the moments had all been one of heated passion, where his hot-blooded nature and natural fires had managed to pull leon in.

but then here leon is, cupping his cheek so gently, seeming so thoughtful and warm and kind as a finger grazes his cheek that it leaves stahn utterly speechless. there weren't many words to begin with, but rather than heated passion, his heart almost feels like it could burst from his chest with how much love seems to go into the gesture. his words, and the kiss that follows... they take a slightly different tone that resonates deeply with stahn.

it's exciting. he wants more.

it seems to fit them well enough, maybe a little better than sloppily trying to get through things. and maybe that's why stahn is content to let this kiss linger a bit longer before he murmurs against leon's lips.]

I just wanted to make sure... Before we went any further. [his words are strangely considerate despite the aroused haze that surrounds stahn, though maybe that in itself is telling of just how deeply he considers leon's needs.] I'm not holding back. I won't, if you don't want me to.

[but stahn will follow that up with another kiss, warm and deep, and a lot less frantic than the other kisses. it doesn't mean he's stopping, or that they won't try to pursue this as far as they can...

but it means there's just a little more of stahn at the helm rather than just stahn's raging hormones desperately seeking out leon's body.

....even though wanting every last inch of it can't be stopped at this point.]

[The tone shifts, but Leon finds he can't be regretful by how it does. It's warm, and so very sweet, and Leon leans into Stahn's kiss with an equally warm and loving response. These kisses are deep, and they linger, and there's just as much intent and want in them as there is warmth and caring, and this suits them both just fine, he thinks. It also gives him time to get control of himself just a bit more, as opposed to before when they were reacting almost entirely on desire and instinct.

Now, the movements Leon makes are completely deliberate.

He shifts his hand from Stahn's cheek down to cup the side of his neck, and with his other hand in Stahn's hair, he's able to hold his head in place gently as he returns the kiss and then starts another, all with the same tone as before.

The shift in atmosphere is so pronounced, but... it almost settles Leon even more. Even as his brain catches up with him, even as he properly realizes what it is they're trying to do, he realizes that he doesn't care. This is what he wants, and the way that Stahn so lovingly looks out for him and his needs only confirms it.

What else could he possibly need?

So he doesn't hesitate, and he doesn't shrink back, and he doesn't freeze up; instead, Leon slides his hand down Stahn's neck, fingers sliding beneath his ~~turtleneck~~ collar and along his collarbone, as much as he can with the shirt in his way, even as he pulls away from the kisses just long enough to breathe a respond. ]

This is what I want you to do.

[Exactly what Stahn's doing--that's what he wants. That's what he wants for sure, and now he knows it 100%]

Then... I'll keep going.

[it serves as a quiet confirmation, an acknowledgment of what they're moving forward towards doing. every kiss, every touch now feels so deliberate and so warm; there's not just desire held in their touches, but also love...

though neither of them moves to say it. somewhere on his tongue, that word does linger somewhere, but never dares to be spoken. it's a bit tough to hold it back when leon is so gentle, when he touches stahn's skin softly enough to send shivers straight up and down his spine, and when he doesn't have even the slightest bit of hesitation.

stahn wants to embrace that, because it's taken them so long to get to the point where they can be this comfortable with one another. so as he shifts to raise his head a bit and give leon another deep, warm kiss, his hands edge away from the beltline and back under leon's shirt and up his back. it's only a temporary motion, one to aid in shifting the mood—and maybe to buy himself another couple of moments of time to figure out what and how to approach this.

maybe now stahn is being a little more cautious, a little more gentle—not out of real hesitation or concern for pushing his limits, but because he wants it to be a good experience.

even though their pauses have given him enough time to realize he doesn't really know what he's doing. he pushes his leg up slightly between leon's legs, grazing against him lightly and making and attempt to shift them into a position where they won't be stuck in just awkward touching beneath clothes—and that's why as he does so, he tugs upwards a little at leon's shirt.

—undressing, that should come first right? at least partially so, he thinks.]

[And that's all Leon could've ever really asked for or wanted.

He knows that they're at the point of "love"--that they have been for a long time, but that it's such a daunting concept that Leon can't bring himself to approach it even in his head. He knows, too, that Stahn is probably holding back on his behalf--but it's still too much.

Even knowing that they both feel that...even as he's on top of Stahn and Stahn pulls at his shirt to rid him of the article of clothing, and even as Leon allows him to do it, he still can't say that he loves Stahn. Not out loud.

Not that it matters, because it may very well be implied in the way that he grits out a startled--]

What are you--

[Stahn's fingers are tugging at Leon's shirt but Stahn's leg is wedged between his thighs, and the added friction there is a surprise--but not one that Leon can hide is good, because he trails off pretty quickly into a sharp intake of breath, hips automatically pressing against Stahn's leg slightly even though he really has no idea what he's going for here.

But he'll at least get what Stahn's going for here, and he shifts to at least let Stahn sit up a little, because if Stahn's going to strip him of his shirt, he thinks he should be able to do the exact same, and he'll do so very demandingly at that, because he's Leon Magnus and even at times like this he's a demanding baby.]

[like this, it's fine.

somehow, even as they both try their best to be smooth about these things, even as they press forward with bouts of fumbling in-between these kisses that seem to be a mix of passionate and sloppy along with warm and full of love and desire... it seems right.

stahn himself likes it this way, where leon sucks in sharp breaths of surprise, but doesn't retreat, how he tries to work with the movements of stahn's body to continue to enjoy what's happening, and how he finds a way to still be commanding in the situation. the power between them seems balanced and thoroughly so—somehow, it just seems to suit them and for stahn, that's perfect. so he'll comply with leon, though maybe not in the way leon initially intended.

he'll force their lips together as he wraps his arms around leon, finding some kind of anchor to pull himself completely upright; he's careful as he does so though, trying to seek the easiest way to guide leon to take a position they already have in the past—leon in his lap, straddling him close. the friction that will come with it will definitely make stahn himself shiver, but it's fine. this way, they can be close, leon can keep some sense of control and even the playing field, and they can try to figure out each part of what comes next together.]

[It's definitely not what he was expecting, but it's not as though he's going to complain; they've always felt as though being close and personal like that, with Leon straddling Stahn's lap, was an intimate and charged position. Even before they were prepared for something like this, it'd seemed that way, and now... now it definitely does, it all comes together, and Leon understands perfectly how they slot together like this, how he can settle into Stahn's lap by pressing their hips together a good deal more forcibly than is strictly necessary, how it's nothing but good feelings when he does so.

But the expression on his face is more thoughtful than anything, because the last time they were in a position like this, Stahn had been a bit too eager and had injured himself and they hadn't been able to go further, and it had disappointed him. It had disappointed both of them, of course, but... Leon's more interested in the fact that Stahn had been disappointed by it.

Because now he has the chance to make up for it.

So even as his own breathing shudders and catches from Stahn's movements and actions, Leon focuses on what he did before--he shifts forward just enough to press his lips to Stahn's lips again, and then moves along his jaw and to his neck, trailing kisses down the crook of his neck and down to his shoulder, just as he'd done before.

He doesn't intend to stop this time, though--that much is clear by how his fingers grasp at Stahn's shirt and pull it up, aiming to get it off of him so that he can properly pursue what he'd had to deny Stahn before.

Sometimes, he really can be a bit of a sap.]

[there's an almost guttural sound that escapes stahn's throat at the sensation of leon's hips pressing so firmly against his. his throat practical goes dry from the warm tingle that spreads throughout his body from that alone.

his hands start to slide down towards leon's waist, but the way leon's lips travel, the way they trail his jaw, his neck and his shoulder just makes stahn's excitement that much more noticeable; with how close their bodies are, it can't be missed at this point. it's, if nothing else, a signal to leon that he's making the right moves, though maybe that would have been obvious from the way he tilts his head to give leon room to move as he pleases with those kisses.

stahn's fingers dig a bit into the flesh of leon's waist out of instinct, and before he can go any further, he feels leon grasping at the fabric of his shirt.

ah.

yes, of course....

so he'll allow it, dropping his arms and ducking slightly to make it easier for leon to pull the shirt up over his head.

he wants this. they both want this, and after their past mishaps, stahn feel so determined to make things go the right way. he's careful in his motions for that reason, because he doesn't want to end up with another split lip, or bumping leon's head, or doing anything that will lead them to a situation as disappointing as their last attempt. they'd both been disappointed, hadn't they? even if stahn himself had been the one to act childish over it. he doesn't want that to happen again.]

[It's not missed, no, but Stahn's really not the only one here. Leon's been attracted to Stahn for a long time--to his smile, to his eyes, to the passion he has and the warmth he embodies--and his body reacts just as well when Stahn runs his hands along his sides and down to his waist, and Leon has to swallow a little shakily, pausing in his kisses to draw in a shaky breath.

But then Stahn works with him on pulling off the shirt, and Leon honestly gets a little overeager--he shifts to pull that shirt over Stahn's head and doesn't really account for his mane, and...after a moment, he realizes that it's a little...caught. He doesn't want to pull too hard, either, or that will just hurt Stahn and really ruin the mood, so for a moment all he can do is just hesitate.

And frown a little.

This isn't what he wanted at all??? And he's still very much aroused and flushed, so stopping also doesn't really strike him as that great of an idea, but what else can be do?

It was Leon's turn to fuck up anyway, clearly.

Awkwardly, he tugs lightly on the shirt, and awkwardly, he clears his throat.

Uh.]

[this isn't something stahn couldn't have accounted for, even though he probably should have. he can pull off his shirt without issue because he's used to his mane; he can't really expect leon to be able to the same.

but this time around, stahn doesn't feel deterred—he's definitely not going to let this stop them, even if slows them down a little. there's something really charming, endearing about the way leon is trying here.

—still, it's comical, isn't it? with his head dipped this way, it's kind of funny to him, and for a moment, his shoulders quake.

...and out follows a warm, audible laugh. stahn can't help himself—it's legitimately a bit funny to end up tangled in his hair and his shirt when they're trying to undress each other. they're fumbling even when they try so hard, and maybe stahn has an easy enough time seeing it as what it is—something they need. they've gone from intensely passionate to much warmer and more intimate, but there's little denying that they've been so focused on doing things right rather than doing what comes natural. he may still be just as aroused as leon (and that's why he has no intention of backing out), but he can afford a laugh. it suits stahn more, and it seems to help him feel more at ease with how they're treading into unfamiliar territory.

but he won't leave things this way—this is awkward, after all. stahn fumbles a bit himself because of the position, but seeks out leon's hands before guiding them towards the back of his shirt, as if to show him exactly where to pull so that stahn can slide himself wholly out of his shirt. and when he does? stahn is all smiles—warm and amused, with his eyes gleaming from behind his aroused gaze. his cheeks and ears are bright pink, and his hair is completely disheveled....

it's fine though, stahn's sure of it.]

[Of course Stahn's laughing.

Leon's already flushed and warm from the situation, but he flushes just a bit further at the laughter; while he knows Stahn isn't judging him, it's still embarrassing to mess up that way. But he's still gentle about how he pulls the shirt off properly once Stahn shows him how, though then he looks away, huffing out a short, embarrassed breath.

He's not really angry or frustrated, of course, but he is a little embarrassed--and of course it's this that would embarrass him first out of everything in this situation, of course it's just not being as capable as he wants to pretend he is in front of Stahn that gets him to shift a little uncomfortably.

On the other hand, shifting his position reminds him that he's in Stahn's lap and it actually feels pretty good, so that doesn't get very far before he's automatically shifting again, pressing his hips forward against Stahn's almost experimentally, and yep, that works just fine, he's perfectly fine with how that feels, a pleased noise escaping him as he does.

It's enough to distract him for a moment from being embarrassed, before he meets Stahn's gaze and remembers that...right..... but mostly his eyes are caught by how Stahn looks like this, disheveled and smiling, shirtless, which he's seen before, but never like this--so really, he's not going to be looking away again, because his attention has been caught, and instead he reaches out to run his fingers through Stahn's hair with almost a surprising amount of concentration, tidying it a little.

Which he'll give a muttered, hoarse explanation for:]

... Your hair may get in the way again, so I will just fix it now. [Whatever, Leon, you just want to touch his hair.]

It helps... Thanks.

[he says it with a warm sort of tone, gentle and appreciative and yet all the same. someone when it's like this, leon is simultaneously extremely attractive and really cute, stahn thinks.

of course he's attractive—stahn loves every part of leon. the delicate yet somehow hardened features of his face, the serious expression in his eyes, the way his hair seems to fall in just a way to keep a little mystery to what he's thinking. he appreciates how even though leon is smaller, he's so svelte and agile, and it shows in the curvatures of his body. even with hands callused from swordplay, they still feel soft against his skin somehow.

naturally it extends beyond the physical; he loves the way leon's cheeks flush when he's embarrassed. he loves when he can pull small and warm smiles out of him behind closed doors, and how leon always tries his best to make sure stahn is happy, even when he's not sure what to do. he doesn't mind when leon calls him in a idiot or pouts like a child, and even when they bicker, he admires the way leon tries to maintain his dignity while a fire burns.

to him, everything about leon is perfect. but those moments like this, when he can see that leon is embarrassed, when he's trying so hard to hide the things he wants by using silly excuses... it's cute. it's uniquely leon, and it makes him happy.

so he leans forward (subsequently forcing their his to press in the process), and kisses leon softly. it's like a small reprieve in the heat of the moment, but one that never seems to lose what they're really aiming for in all of this.]

It's nice anyway... when you touch my hair like that. [which is a truth, though maybe one he's never expressed. but he loves the feeling of leon's fingers in his hair, embracing even the most inconsequential of his features without ever acting like it's burdensome that he has so much hair.

it's important.

he's still all smiles too, even if they're a little goofy looking, as his hands rest at the small of leon's back before slowly tracing towards the front side.]

[Stahn moving beneath him is going to be the death of him, Leon's pretty sure. The way their hips press together with each of Stahn's little minute shifts and movements causes Leon's breath to catch every time, and when Stahn properly leans forward like that, the friction drags a little groan out of Leon, one that's mostly muffled into that kiss--which is ironically soft enough that make for an odd contrast.

The softness of their kisses and affection and words, Stahn's gentle smiles and Leon's gentle motions, and the contrast between that and the way that their bodies are so hypersensitive to every movement or shift they make, that Stahn's touch causes Leon to shiver and that he can feel his body react to everything Stahn does, because he just wants more--

But that contrast...is how they function, and it suits them.

Just as the love and care they have for each other is important, it's important too that they are able to properly embrace everything about each other. They've been waiting for this too long to mess it up, either by hesitating or by rushing forward without proper care.

No, they're doing this deliberately and warmly, and it's how it should be done, so even if it makes Leon blush a little despite himself when Stahn says something like that, a phrase that's almost obscene in its innocence and simplicity, and yet still so capable of meaning more-- and he clears his throat awkwardly and...nods.]

Then... I have no issues with this.

[None at all... he doesn't have any issues with anything, honestly, this is all a-okay by him. Instead, with the same level of concentration as before, he slides both hands through Stahn's hair, gathering the strands slowly and deliberately, fingers dragging lightly along Stahn's scalp, bringing his hands together to form a ponytail.]

Like this, perhaps.

[Both that he likes the picture Stahn makes like this (and it's a pretty picture indeed, with Stahn's face flushed and his lips red, with his eyes watching Leon like this...

And, well, that he likes being able to touch Stahn like this as well.]

[there's something absolutely tantalizing about the way leon is right now; even in these moments that are somehow softer and more gentle, the obvious intentions have not faltered. they're not backing down from where they intend to take things, and even the most innocuous of conversations in the midst of this situation just... excites stahn.

though maybe it's not just the conversation. maybe it's it's the groans that come alongside the friction and the way that vibration seems to carry directly into stahn's mouth that makes hos own breath hitch a little. the feeling is only further amplified by way leon touching his hair, the way his fingers drag across his scalp, but how he remains careful enough to not tangle the hair or tug on it in a way that would cause him any sort of real pain.

instead what he has is leon shaping his hair into a fashion he hardly ever uses for himself, and an expression on leon's face that indicates that he'd like it like that.]

It's fine that way... if you like it. [he staggers the words between kisses. if leon wants his hair in a ponytail right now... he'd comply. if that would make him happy, if that would somehow make him more attractive—stahn can't complain. seeing leon take things into his own hands in a literal way is always exciting; he likes it when leon goes for the things he wants.

especially when the thing leon wants is stahn.

this is fine.

stahn himself is willing to show how okay he is with this by once again shifting his hands around the back—it's all deliberate and intentional, touching and teasing to play at leon's skin before even doing a thing, only this time, stahn's fingers tease below the beltline once more, tugging the fabric gently a bit downwards.

he's not really sure if this is the right way to do this, but he has to try.]

[Despite the situation, and despite how heated and charged it still is even with this small interlude, Leon's honestly sincerely tickled by how seriously Stahn responds to that. Even if it's between kisses, even if he's still smiling, there's something so painfully sincere about that response, and it's...it's cute.

It's not the first time Leon's thought that Stahn is cute, but he supposes there's no better time than when they're both half-naked and he's straddling Stahn's lap, hips pressed to Stahn's without any intention of pulling away, because...well, why would he?

Unfortunately, Leon doesn't carry hair ties around, and the last thing he wants to do is move away from Stahn for something so pointless, so in the end he has to let go of Stahn's hair and watch it fall back into its typical mane, even if a little tidier now, though he still likes how Stahn looks like this as well (because, well... obviously... and with Stahn's fingers sliding lower and lower, he doesn't really have the room to worry about inconsequential things like what style Stahn's hair is in.

He clears his throat weakly as Stahn's fingers slide beneath his pants and tug, breathing out a slow, shuddering breath, eyes half-lidded. He doesn't know what they're doing either, or how they're going to proceed or even what the right way to do this is, but this has been good, and enjoyable, and so why stop? They must be doing something right.

So while Stahn gets adventurous at the back, Leon will shift instead to run his fingers from Stahn's hair to his shoulders and then his collarbone and down to his chest--because even if Stahn's the sort to occasionally walk around shirtless, Leon's never really been able to touch (though Stahn probably wouldn't have argued that), and honestly? He's not going to miss his chance now, not when he can finally explore and touch and experience for himself. He'll move on as well, when he has an idea of how he wants to do that, but he's gotten distracted by this.]

[the liking of a ponytail isn't something stahn will forget—even if they aren't pursuing it right now, if it's something that leon wants to see, then he can make that happen. but not now.

not when he feels leon's fingers exploring his chest. not when every touch still manages to give him goosebumps. and certainly not when his hands are in a precarious position. they're about to take a huge step right now, and there is a certain amount of weight to the fact that they're committing to this. what they're going to do... it's everything. to someone like stahn, who is the furthest from anything resembling promiscuous, a person who has an understanding of things but still such firm beliefs in his own morals and dreams... this isn't a step to be taken lightly.

they've fumbled time and time again, and while those times were disappointing—be it from fumbling or from certain admittances—he knows know that neither he nor leon had been ready to take this step. they wanted it, but there's so much more than comes with it in stahn's mind.

it's the purest form and expression of love to him; words don't mean as much as actions after all... something he'd always been taught, but that he never completely understood until he was with leon. leon, who was terrible at putting his feelings into words, but could channel them all into his actions, be them gentle, curious touches or hard, aggressive kisses. and maybe all of that is exactly why even though stahn doesn't hesitate, he takes a moment before he continues.

he needs to suck in a quiet breath and handle this right. passionate, but gentle enough, with no hesitation. he's trying his best to exude a bit of confidence, but his nerves definitely leave his mouth a little dry. even still though... he keeps going, tugging at leon's pants, gently pulling them down a bit of the way; it definitely leaves leon a bit exposed, but he only stops when he gets as far as he can go while he's still being straddled.

and with that, he gives leon a curious look, to make sure he's still okay... but it's also one that is undoubtedly nervous and sheepish, because he knows that if he shifts his gaze, he'll be able to see all of leon.

and that's a pretty huge step for them both.]

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